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would fall, and rise no more. This led me to some spiritual meditations, which were very refreshing to me. I was unable to attend public worship, either part of the day; but God was pleased to afford me fixedness and satisfaction in divine" thoughts. Nothing so refreshes my soul, as when I can go to God, yea, to God my exceeding joy. When he is so sensibly, to my soul, O how unspeakably delightful is this!

"In the week past, I had divers turns of inward refreshing ; though my body was inexpressibly weak, followed continually with agues and fevers. Sometimes my soul centred in God, as my only portion; and I felt that I should be for ever unhappy, if He did not reign. I saw the sweetness and happiness of being his subject, at his disposal. This made all my difficulties quickly vanish.

"From this Lord's day, viz. Aug. 23, I was troubled very much with vapoury disorders, and could neither write nor read, and could scarcely live; although through mercy, was not so much oppressed with heavy melancholy and gloominess, as at many other times."

Till this week, he had been wont to lodge in a room above stairs; but he now grew so weak that he was no longer able to go up stairs and down. Friday, Aug. 28, was the last time he ever went above stairs; henceforward he betook himself to a lower room.

On Wednesday, Sept. 2, being the day of our public lecture, he seemed to be refreshed with seeing the neighbouring ministers who came hither to the lecture, and expressed a great desire once more to go to the house of God on that day and accordingly rode to the meeting, and attended divine service, while the Reverend Mr. Woodbridge, of Hatfield, preached. He signified that he supposed it to be the last time he should ever attend public worship, as it proved. Indeed, it was the last time that he ever went out of our gate alive.

On the Saturday evening next following, he was unexpectedly visited by his brother, Mr. John Brainerd, who came to see him from New-Jersey. He was much refreshed by this unexpected visit, this brother being peculiarly dear to him; and he seemed to rejoice in a devout and solemn manner, to see him, and to hear the comfortable tidings which he brought concerning the state of his dear congregation of Christian Indians. A circumstance of this visit, of which he was exceedingly glad, was, that his brother brought him some of his private writings from New-Jersey, and particularly his diary which he had kept for many years past.

Lord's day, Sept. 6.
VOL. X.

"I began to read some of my private

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writings, which my brother brought me; and was considerably refreshed with what I found in them.

Sept. 7. “I proceeded further in reading my old private writings, and found that they had the same effect upon me as before. I could not but rejoice and bless God for what passed long ago, which without writing had been entirely lost.

"This evening, when I was in great distress of body, my soul longed that God should be glorified: I saw there was no character but this. I could not but speak to the by-standers then of the only happiness, viz. pleasing God. O that I could for ever live to God! The day, I trust, is at hand, the perfect day. O the day of deliverance from all sin!

Lord's day, Sept. 13. "I was much refreshed and engaged in meditation and writing, and found a heart to act for God. My spirits were refreshed, and my soul delighted to do something for God.”

On the evening following that Lord's day, his feet began to appear sensibly swelled; which thenceforward swelled more and more. A symptom of his dissolution coming on. The next day, his brother John left him, being obliged to return to New-Jersey on some business of great importance and necessity; intending to return again with all possible speed, hoping to see his brother yet once more in the land of the living.

BRAINERD having now, with much deliberation, considered of the important affair before mentioned, which was referred to him by the honourable commissioners in Boston, of the corporation in London for the propagation of the gospel in NewEngland, and parts adjacent, viz. the fixing upon and recommending of two persons proper to be employed as missionaries to the Six Nations; about this time wrote a letter, recommending two young gentlemen of his acquaintance to those commissioners, viz. Mr. Elihu Spencer, of East-Haddam, and Mr. Job Strong, of Northampton. The commissioners, on the receipt of this letter, cheerfully and unanimously agreed to accept of and employ the persons whom he had recommended. They accordingly since have waited on the commissioners to receive their instructions; and pursuant to these have applied themselves to a preparation for the business of their mission. One of them, Mr. Spencer, has been solemnly ordained to that work, by several of the ministers of Boston, in the presence of an ecclesiastical council convened for that purpose; and is now gone forth to the nation of Oneidas, about a hundred and seventy miles beyond Albany.

On Wednesday, Sept. 16, he wrote a letter to a gentleman in Boston, (one of those charitable persons beforementioned, who appeared so forward to contribute of their substance for promoting Christianity among the Indians,) relating to the

growth of the Indian school, and the need of another schoolmaster, or some person to assist the schoolmaster in instructing the Indian children. These gentlemen, on the receipt of this letter, had a meeting, and agreed with great cheerfulness to give 2007. (in bills of the old tenor,) for the support of another schoolmaster; and desired the Rev. Mr. Pemberton, of New York, (who was then at Boston, and was also, at their desire, present at their meeting,) as soon as possible to procure a suitable person for that service; and also agreed to allow 74l. to defray some special charges which were requisite to encourage the mission to the Six Nations, (besides the salary allowed by the commissioners,) which was also done on some intimations given by BRAINERD.

BRAINERD spent himself much in writing those letters, being exceedingly weak; but it seemed to be much to his satisfaction that he had been enabled to do it; hoping that it was something done for God, and which might be for the advancement of Christ's kingdom and glory. In writing the last of these letters, he was obliged to use the hand of another, not being able to write himself.

On the Thursday of this week, (Sept. 17,) was the last time that ever he went out of his lodging room. That day, he was again visited by his brother Israel, who continued with him thenceforward till his death. On that evening he was taken with something of a diarrhea, which he looked upon as another sign of his approaching death; whereupon he expressed himself thus: "Oh, the glorious time is now coming! I have longed to serve God perfectly now God will gratify those desires!" And from time to time, at the several steps and new symptoms of the sensible approach of his dissolution, he was so far from being sunk or damped, that he seemed to be animated, and made more cheerful, as being glad at the appearance of death's approach. He often used the epithet glorious, when speaking of the day of his death, calling it that glorious day. And as he saw his dissolution gradually approaching, he talked much about it; and with perfect calmness spoke of a future state. He also settled all his affairs, giving directions very particularly and minutely, concerning what he would have done in one respect and another after his decease. And the nearer death approached, the more desirous he seemed to be of it. He several times spoke of the different kinds of willingness to die; and represented it as an ignoble, mean kind, to be willing to leave the body, only to get rid of pain; or to go to heaven, only to get honour and advancement there.

Sept. 19. "Near night, while I attempted to walk a little, my thoughts turned thus: How infinitely sweet it is, to love God, and be all for him! Upon which it was suggested to

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me, You are not an angel, not lively and active.' To which my whole soul immediately replied, I as sincerely desire to love and glorify God, as any angel in heaven.' Upon which it was suggested again, But you are filthy, not fit for heaven. Hereupon instantly appeared the blessed robes of Christ's righteousness, in which I could not but exult and triumph; and I viewed the infinite excellency of God, and my soul even broke with longings, that God should be glorified. I thought of dignity in heaven; but instantly the thought returned, I do not go to heaven to get honour, but to give all possible glory and praise.' O how I longed that God should be glorified on earth also! OI was made-for eternity-if God might be glorified! Bodily pains I cared not for; though I was then in extremity, I never felt easier. I felt willing to glorify God in that state of bodily distress, as long as he pleased I should continue in it. The grave appeared really sweet, and I longed to lodge my weary bones in it: but Oh, that God might be glorified! this was the burden of all my cry. O I knew that I should be active as an angel, in heaven; and that I should be stripped of my filthy garments! so that there was no objection. But, O to love and praise God more, to please him for ever! this my soul panted after, and even now pants for while I write. Oh that God might be glorified in the whole earth! Lord let thy kingdom come.' I longed for a spirit of preaching to descend and rest on ministers, that they might address the consciences of men with closeness and power. I saw that God had the residue of the Spirit;' and my soul longed that it should be poured from on high.' I could not but plead with God for my dear congregation, that he would preserve it, and not suffer his great name to lose its glory in that work; my soul still longing that God might be glorified."

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The extraordinary frame he was in, that evening, could not be hid. "His mouth spake out of the abundance of his heart," expressing in a very affecting manner much the same things as are written in his diary. Among very many other extraordinary expressions, which he then uttered, were such as these: My heaven is to please God, and glorify him, and to give all to him, and to be wholly devoted to his glory: that is the heaven I long for; that is my religion, and that is my happiness, and always was ever since I suppose I had any true religion and all those that are of that religion shall meet me in heaven. I do not go to heaven to be advanced, but to give honour to God. It is no matter where I shall be stationed in heaven, whether I have a high or low seat there; but to love, and please, and glorify God is all. Had I a thousand souls, if they were worth any thing, I would give them all to God; but I have nothing to give, when all is done.-It is impossible for

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any rational creature to be happy without acting all for God; God himself could not make him happy any other way. I long to be in heaven, praising and glorifying God with the holy angels; all my desire is to glorify God.--My heart goes out to the burying place; it seems to me a desirable place: but O to glorify God! that is it ; that is above all. It is a great comfort to me to think, that I have done a little for God in the world: Oh! it is but a very small matter, yet I have done a little; and I lament it, that I have not done more for him.-There is nothing in the world worth living for, but doing good, and finishing God's work, doing the work that Christ did. I see nothing else in the world that can yield any satisfaction, besides living to God, pleasing him, and doing his whole will.-My greatest joy and comfort has been, to do something for promoting the interest of religion and the souls of particular persons: and now, in my illness while I am full of pain and distress, from day to day, all the comfort I have, is in being able to do some little service for God, either by something that I say, or by writing, or in some other way.

He intermingled with these and other like expressions, many pathetical counsels to those who were about him; particularly to my children and servants. He applied himself to some of my younger children at this time; calling them to him, and speaking to them one by one; setting before them, in a very plain manner, the nature and essence of true piety, and its great importance and necessity; earnestly warning them not to rest in any thing short of a true and thorough change of heart, and a life devoted to God.-He counselled them not to be slack in the great business of religion, nor in the least to delay it ; enforcing his counsels with this, that his words were the words of a dying man said he, " I shall die here, and here I shall be buried, and here you will see my grave, and do you remember what I have said to you. I am going into eternity and it is sweet for me to think of eternity: the endlessness of it makes it sweet: but O what shall I say to the eternity of the wicked! I cannot mention it, nor think of it; the thought is too dreadful. When you see my grave, then remember what I said to you while I was alive; then think with yourself, how the man who lies in that grave, counselled and warned me to prepare for death."

His body seemed to be marvellously strengthened, through the inward vigour and refreshment of his mind; so that, although before he was so weak that he could hardly utter a sentence, yet now he continued his most affecting and profitable discourse to us for more than an hour, with scarce any intermission; and said of it, when he had done," it was the last sermon that ever he should preach."-This extraordinary frame of mind continued the next day, of which he says in his diary as follows:

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