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unworthy servant, and save the soul that would be thine. But, why should a living man complain? a man for the punishment of his sins? I am sensible I deserve the withdrawings of God's countenance for ever. Ah! if we were treated according to our deserts, what could exceed our misery! But blessed be the Lord, who delighteth in mercy; whose free grace is boundless as our sins. He is my sun though he refuse to shine. Though for a moment he depart, he will not ut. terly forsake the dust who trusts in him. What is there in heaven or in earth, that I desire beside thee, O Lord most holy!
. To spend one day with thee on earth,
Exceeds a thousand thousand days of mirth. Ill health has kept me from the sanctuary to-day. I have had a still quiet sabbath, and room for self-exami. nation. Like the humble publican, I would exclaim, God be merciful to me a sinner! I see so much of unbelief and sin mixed with my nature, that with grief and hatred of sin, I would turn from myself unto Christ, who alone is willing, able, and worthy to save. 'Tis one of the sweetest promises that ever saluted a mor. tal's ear, those who come unto me I will in no wise cast off. O— , why will not poor perishing sinners listen to the blessed assurance, and flee unto the rock of safety! The situation of our young friends, and of this town in general, lies with uncommon weight upon my mind. O that they were wise, that they understood this, and would now attend to the things which relate to their everlasting peace! _ , let us be diligent, faithful to watch, and pray, not for ourselves, only, but others; that we yield not to the temptations with which we are surrounded, and thereby seal our eternal misery. What is the gain of the whole world to the loss of our immortal souls ?
When I saw so many turning their backs upon the blessed ordinance last sabbath, indifferently gaz
ing at the memorials of the Lord of glory, and practically saying to the wounded Saviour, you have died in vain, we will have no part in thee ; my heart yearned with anguish, and my spirit whispered, Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. Gratitude then succeeded. Like them I once was blind. O, the infinite mercy of that God who opened my eyes, to see the beauty of holiness, and the necessity of an interest in Jesus. The Lord hath shown himself gracious. He yet reigneth; let the earth rejoice. Hope in the Lord, O my soul, and be not disquieted within me! Do write to me ; we need constant exhortation and provocation to good works.
Albany, 25th March, 1804. My dear SM Y heart will not acknowledge that it has neglected
you, though your good letter is yet unanswered. Neglect must be the fruit of a colder sentiment than any I feel towards you, or ever can feel while I am sensible of your goodness, and the tenderness with which you love me. I have been but poorly in health since you was here, and been more than commonly crowded with weighty cares; yet, often has my every feeling responded to the truth of your position, that "tasteless and insipid are the common scenes," and common acquaintances of life, after such sympathy and refined enjoyment as springs from real friendship. I subscribed to it heartily, my dear S , on the receipt of your letter; for that was salutary to my feelings, as the shadow of a rock to a weary, sun-burnt pilgrim. I had been, for three or four days, (from necessity you may well suppose,) conversant with a routine of company, as different from you, and from any thing I love, as from the pleasant hill hefore your dwelling, when a May morning gilds it. My
poor lonesome mind, accustomed not only to the absence of such conversation as I loved, but to hearing all I did not love, spoken of with ridicule; suffering, not only the want of christian communion, but pity and sorrow for the actually irreligious; had become quite depressed, (for me,) and really felt the truth of, “all is vanity and vexation of spirit”. when my kindest of friends came from the store, which was of itself reviving, and told me he had “a cordial for me;" such it proved - ; and shall we not, if we humbly trust in the great Physician of souls, always find our trials interspersed with cordials, without which we should faint, and become weary in our pilgrimage. From this little incident I found an ample scope for moralizing; whether to my own advantage or not, He only knoweth, “who is of purer eyes than to behold iniquity.” The checks to our joys, and the alleviations of our sorrows, are wise. ly and sweetly intermingled : and though I sometimes feel sorrows and distresses incident to humani. ty—am sometimes caught, with the multitude, complaining of the miseries and follies of our world, yet my reason, and I hope my heart, assents to the wis. dom with which it is governed. I think I would not wish it otherwise : for, were the scale of enjoyment more deeply laden, where should I have learned to say, with Job, I loath it! I would not live always?” Where should I have been taught to “pant toward those eternal hills, whose heavens are fairer than they seem?” On the other hand, if the cypress of afflic. tion was constantly to shade our days, and we were made to drink of the wormwood and the gall con. stantly, as our sins deserve, how could this frail na. ture support us through the vale of gloom ? How should we devote the burthen of this life acceptably to Him, who demandeth cheerful sacrifices, and delighteth not in the sighs of the wretched? Oh! God hath done all things well; and it is sufficient, my dear friend, to satisfy us with the world, that he governs it. His wisdom is at the helm. His providence di. rects all the minutiæ of creation. This belief is my comfort and my support. It enhances the blessings he so kindly pours upon me; and I hope and trust it will be an anchor to my soul in all the trials that may be in store for me to endure. In this world ye shall have tribulation, is the language of Christ. The Christian believes it; he expects it; and though his * nature struggles under the stroke of adversity, his faith is triumphant; his resignation is sincere; and his peace, the world, as it gave not, cannot take from him.
have tribine for me to er soul in all th
Albany, Feb. 12, 1804. I HAVE been in poor health ever since I have been a house-keeper, and some time before ; so much so, that I have in a manner neglected all epistolary oblations to friendship, and thought myself highly favoured, whenever for a little season I have been able to attend to the more imperious calls of domestic concern. I am now better, but I dont know whether any wiser for bearing the yoke. Mercies have wooed and invited me to hasten my footstep to the source of pleasure ; but my pace is tardy. Tender chastise. ments are given to impel me forward, but I move still like a sluggard. . Nature, with all its sensu. alities, is drawing back, decoying, hindering my progress to those celestial regions where grace and glory shall find no more opponents. That idea is a comfort. : Oh! it is a cordial to look forward, not to the moment, but to the eternity, when there shall be no more warfare between flesh and spirit; when corruption shall put on incorruption, and mortal be clothed with immortality. The triumph of grace is a triumph indeed, compared with which the triumph of a Cæsar is a pitiful lamentation. “ Grace makes
the slave a freeman ;” and the unshackled spirit spurning at the chains, which boast their power, may safely triumph over the grand enemies of mature, saying to one, Where is thy sting? and to the other, Where is thy boasted victory? Jesus_blessed be the name of our RedeemerJesus has procured this language, this victory for us. Oh! how ought we to love him, to serve him, to plead for him, and long to go to him!
When I see " the world" so faithful around me in the service of their idols—when I hear the buz of applause that mortals give to mortalswhen talents and genius are arrogating or receiving that praise and adoration which can only be due to the Creator of them, and divine honours are paid to qualities that death will soon level to the dust, my heart exclaims, dear Saviour of the wretched! where are thy advocates? thy admirers? Where the eulogiums due to oratory such as thine ? “ It is finished,” was the closing strain : Oh! the worth of that one short sen. tence! Not all the united powers of eloquence and mortal grace can reach it. A world cannot fathom; but an eternity shall admire it.-" It is finished.”_ Oh! , though negligence abounds, if we are his followers, let us take this for our creed, and trust in him who has thus completed the work. Salvation “is finished” on the Saviour's part: and on ours it will be, when we yield entirely to him. Does the world trouble you, or do you live above it? Has doubling yourself doubled your earthly cares? or are you seeking for nothing but the pilgrim's staff to travel through with? I ask you, "for where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty,” and may be it will do you good to examine your heart for an an. swer, and me: to hear its award. “ As for me, my lines are cast in pleasant places; if I come short of the goal, the blood will be upon my own head : for, blessed be my Father, what many a sad soul la