DIARY, &c.

APPREHENDING that the keeping a Diary might have in sundry respects been useful, and contributed to an increase in the spiritual life, essays have at various times been attempted; the last in the summer, 1776, on being relieved from a disorder which I esteemed dangerous: but after a short continuation, "The bough was lopped with terror."

On the first day of the Sixth Month, in the year 1780, and in the 62d of my age, I renew the recording of some circumstances which have occurred, and which may yet occur. The number of my days, or, perhaps, only hours remaining, being certainly few and evil, the present attempt seems unseasonable. Nevertheless, if it please the Lord to look upon it with approbation, "New wine may be found in the cluster," and the Watcher and the Holy One may say, "Destroy it not, for a blessing is in it."

A

FIFTH MONTH, 1780.

14. I went up to the yearly meeting at London, and attended divers of the meetings both for worship and discipline; the former were in the general large and solemn; much peace presided in the latter; brotherly exhortations were in love imparted, and a concern expressed for the manifold deviations from our ancient Christian testimonies, respecting "speech, behayiour, and apparel." Babylon is within; but from her very outlines were our ancestors called forth, and these testimonies were committed to them and their children, as increasing testimonies, until they have filled the earth; the customs of the people are vain; hat honour is the most unmeaning ceremony, the merest phantom that ever pride and folly obtruded on their deluded votaries.

20. I returned from London to Hartford, impressed with some sense of the preservations of the preceding week; sought a tribute of praise to the Preserver of men; but, as on the mountains of Gilboa, "there was no rain, nor dew, nor fields of offering."

21. I went to the forenoon meeting at Hartford in distress of mind; very unexpectedly some qualifications for a public ministry seemed to attend, the words presented were, "Work while it is day, for the night cometh in which no man can work ;" an explanation of the nature of the

work was attempted, accordingly as it is written, "This is the work of God, that ye believe in him whom God hath sent:" a degree of solemnity prevailed.

23 and 24. The quarterly and yearly meetings at Hartford were not large, but measurably favored.

25 and 26. In my solitary retreats this inquiry occurred, "When shall the fir-tree appear instead of the thorn, and the myrtle instead of the briar, that it may be to the Lord for a name, and for an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off."

27. I cautioned a neighbour against addressing me with a flattering title; the caution was received in a friendly manner, and the propriety of the remark allowed.

28. Mary Ridgeway and Jane Watson from Ireland came to our house, and were at our meeting on first-day; the meetings were large, and their service in them was lively and acceptable. I sat with them in the gallery, but although somewhat elevated in respect to local situation, deeply depressed in spirit; esteeming myself not only unfit for the ministry, but even to be an attendant upon, or entertainer of, the Lord's servants.

SIXTH MONTH, 1780.

3. It is written, "The voice of rejoicing and salvation is in the habitation of the righteous;"

but for many days past my soul hath been far from peace: the roll written within and without with mourning, lamentation and woe, hath seemed to be the sole furniture of my solitary habitation.

4. In the forenoon meeting at Hartford, I sat under a deep and almost agonizing sense of my past iniquities, and frequent deviations from the paths of peace; not a penitential tear produced : but wherefore dost thou complain, O my soul ! for the punishment of thy sins? The immaculate Lamb, who knew no sin, suffered much more abundantly; "thou art justly in this condemnation," "but he had done nothing amiss."

6. With much reluctance, and under great distress, I accompanied Samuel Spavold and John Miller in visiting five families at and near Hoddesdon; the gospel was preached; in one of them particularly so. Some cause of thankfulness for the preservation and attendance of the day.

7. I was particularly condemned for conversing unnecessarily respecting politics and religion. Peace is thy profession. Labour to live peaceably with all men.

8. I went to Ware with Samuel Spavold, and visited five families; I had in one of them a remarkable opening respecting my own state, on these words, "It is only the Lion of the tribe of Judah," that can cause the lion and the lamb to lie down together :" my lips were sealed in silence.

9. This day was passed in serenity and composure; a miracle of grace.

ro. Much mischief hath been done this week in and about the metropolis, on account of the protestant petition having been presented, but not immediately considered. O! the infatuation that the professors of religion, whose characteristic is peace and love, should by any means become the instigators of bloodshed and devastation; or that they should at any time begrudge others the immunities which they themselves wish to enjoy! "Tell it not in Gath, publish it not in the streets of Ashkelon," lest the infidels triumph.

12. I am convinced from a daily heartfelt sensation, stronger than ten thousand arguments, that until we cease to do evil, we cannot learn to do well. No acceptable worship can be either internally or externally offered to the God of truth, while we are acting contrary to the dictates of truth in our own consciences. "There is no

"Let

peace to the wicked." "If we regard iniquity in our hearts, the Lord will not hear us." him who nameth the name of Christ depart from iniquity." These testimonies were formerly borne by free-grace men, who lived by grace; and they will for ever baffle the efforts of antinomianism.. The only ability to cease to do evil is in a divine and supernatural principle, the grace and truth which comes by Jesus Christ; or in other words, in the Comforter, the agent and representative of the holy head, by which he is present with his people, always to the end of the world; "Christ in them the hope of glory." Some days have been