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Be thine, my stationer! this magic gift;
Cook shall be Prior, and Concanen, Swift:
So shall each hostile name become our own,
And we too boast our Garth and Addison 3.'

With that she gave him (piteous of his case,
Yet smiling at his rueful length of face)
A shaggy Tap’stry 4, worthy to be spread
On Codrus' old, or Dunton's modern bed5;
Instructive work! whose wry-mouth'd portraiture
Display'd the fates her confessors endure.
Earless on high, stood unabash'd De Foe,
And Tutchin? flagrant from the scourge below.
There Ridpath, Roper , cudgelld might ye view;
The very worsted still look black and blue.
Himself among the story'd chiefs he spies,
As, from the blanket, high in air he flies;
And “Oh!” (he cry’d) “what street, what lane but knows
Our purgings, pumpings, blankettings, and blows?
In ev'ry loom our labours shall be seen,
And the fresh vomit run for ever green!”

See in the circle next, Eliza 10 plac'd,

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! Cook shall be Prior,] The man here speci- But Mr. Concanen, in his dedication of the letfied writ a thing called The Battle of Poets, in ters, advertisements, &c. to the author of the which Philips and Welsted were the Heroes, and Dunciad, assures us, "that Juvenal never satiSwist and Pope utterly routed. He also published rized the Poverty of Codrus." P. some malevolent things in the British, London, John Dunton was a broken bookseller, and and Daily Journals; and at the same time wrote abusive scribbler; he writ Neck or Nothing, a letters to Mr Pope, protesting his innocence. violent satire on some ministers of state; a libel His chief work was a translation of Hesiod, to on the Duke of Devonshire and the Bishop of which Theobald writ notes and half notes, which Peterborough, &c. P. he carefully owned. P.

6 [Cf. ante, note to Bk. I. v. 103.] 2 [See Pope's note to v. 299.)

7 And Tutchin flagrant from the scourge! 3 And we too boast our Garth and Addison.] John Tutchin, author of some vile verses, and of Nothing is more remarkable than our author's a weekly paper called the Observator: He was love of praising good writers. has in this sentenced to be whipped through several towts very poem celebrated Mr Locke, Sir Isaac in the west of England, upon which he petitioned Newton, Dr Barrow, Dr Atterbury, Mr Dry- King James II. to be hanged. When that prince den, Mr Congreve, Dr Garth, Mr Addison ; in died in exile, he wrote an invective against his a word, almost every man of his time that de- memory, occasioned by some humane elegies oa served it; even Cibber himself (presuming him to his death. He lived to the time of Queen Anne. be author of the Careless Husband). It was very P. [He was the author of The Foreigner, the difficult to have that pleasure in a poem on this Satire on William III. which provoked De Foe's subject, yet he has found means to insert their True-born Englishman. The sentence to which panegyric, and has made even Dulness out of Pope refers was pronounced by Judge Jeffreys her own mouth pronounce it. It must have been but remitted in return for a bribe which reduced particularly agreeable to him to celebrate Dr the prisoner to poverty. See Macaulay's History Garth; both as his constant friend, and as he of England, chap. 5.) was his predecessor in this kind of satire. P. 8 There Ridpath, Roper,] Authors of the [Part om.)

Flying-post and Post-boy, two scandalous papers 4 A shaggy Tap'stry] A sorry kind of Tapes- on different sides, for which they equally and try frequent in old inns, made of worsted or some alternately deserved to be cudgelled, and were coarser stuff, like that which is spoken of by so. P. Donne-Faces as frightful as theirs who whip 9 Himself among the story'd chiefs ke søies,] Christ in old hangings. The imagery woven in the history of Curl's being tossed in a blanket, it alludes to the mantle of Cloanthus, in Æn. v. and whipped by the scholars of Westminster, is [v. 250, ff.) P.

well known. P. (Part om.] 5. On Codrus' old, or Dunton's modern bed;] 10 Eliza Haywood ] This woman was authorese Of Codrus the poet's bed, see Juvenal, describing of those most scandalous books called the Court of his poverty very copiously, Sat. v. 103, &c. Carimania, and the new Utopia. P. (Part om.)

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Two babes of love close clinging to her waist;
Fair as before her works she stands confess'd,
In flow'rs and pearls by bounteous Kirkall? dress’d.
The Goddess then : “Who best can send on high
“ The salient spout, far-streaming to the sky;
“His be yon Juno of majestic size,
“With cow-like udders, and with ox-like eyes.
This China Jordan let the chief o'ercome
“Replenish, not ingloriously, at home.”

Osborne ? and Curl accept the glorious strife,
(Tho’ this his Son dissuades, and that his Wife).
One on his manly confidence relies;
One on his vigour and superior size.
First Osborne lean'd against his letter'd post;
It rose, and labour'd to a curve at most.
So Jove's bright bow displays its wat’ry round,
(Sure sign that no spectator shall be drown'd).
À second effort brought but new disgrace:
The wild Mæander wash'd the Artist's face;
Thus the small jet, which hasty hands unlock,
Spirts in the gard’ner's eyes who turns the cock.
Not so from shameless Curl; impetuous spread
The stream, and smoking flourish'd o'er his head.
So (fam'd like thee for turbulence and horns)
Eridanus his humble fountain scorns;
Thro' half the heav'ns he pours th' exalted urn;
His rapid waters in their passage burn.

Swift as it mounts, all follow with their eyes :
Still happy Impudence obtains the prize.
Thou triumph'st, Victor of the high-wrought day,
And the pleas’d dame, soft smiling, lead'st away.
Osborne, thro' perfect modesty o’ercome,
Crown'd with the Jordan, walks contented home.

But now for Authors nobler palms remain;
“Room for my Lord !” three jockeys in his train;
Six huntsmen with a shout precede his chair:
He grins, and looks broad nonsense with a stare.
His Honour's meaning Dulness thus exprest,
“He wins this Patron, who can tickle best.

He chinks his purse, and takes his seat of state':
With ready quills the Dedicators wait;
Now at his head the dext'rous task commence,
And, instant, fancy feels th' imputed sense;

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i Kirkall, the name of an Engraver. Some Iliad at half the price : Of which books he had of this Lady's works were printed in four volumes none, but cut to the size of them (which was in 12mo, with her picture thus dressed up before Quarto) the common books in folio, without them. P.

Copper-plates, on a worse paper, and never above 2 Osborne, Thomas) A bookseller in Gray's- half the value. P. [Part om.] Of Osborne inn, very well qualified by his impudence to act Johnson used to say, that he had no sense of this part; and therefore placed here instead of a any shame, but that of being poor. Bannister less deserving Predecessor. This man published [quoted by Bowles, who refers to the well-known advertisements for a year together, pretending episode in Boswell, concerning J.'s summary to sell Mr Pope's subscription books of Homer's. chastisement of O. See Boswell ad ann. 1742.]

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Now gentle touches wanton o'er his face,
He struts Adonis, and affects grimace:
Rollil the feather to his ear conveys,
Then his nice taste directs our Operas:
Bentleyo his mouth with classic flatt'ry opes,

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And the puff’d orator bursts out in tropes.
But Welsted 3 most the Poet's healing balm
Strives to extract from his soft, giving palm;
Unlucky Welsted! thy unfeeling master,
The more thou ticklest, gripes his fist the faster.

While thus each hand promotes the pleasing pain,
And quick sensations skip from vein to vein;
A youth unknown to Phoebus, in despair“,
Puts his last refuge all in heav'n and pray'r.
What force have pious vows! The Queen of Love

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His sister sends, her vot’ress, from above.
As, taught by Venus, Paris learnt the art
To touch Achilles' only tender part;
Secure, thro' her, the noble prize to carry,
He marches off his Grace's Secretary.

“Now turn to diff'rent sports,” (the Goddess cries)
“And learn, my sons, the wond'rous pow'r of Noise.
To move, to raise, to ravish ev'ry heart,
With Shakespear's nature, or with Jonson's art,
Let others aim : 'tis yours to shake the soul

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With Thunder rumbling from the mustard-bowl',
With horns and trumpets now to madness swell,
Now sink in sorrows with a tolling bello;
Such happy arts attention can command,
When fancy flags, and sense is at a stand.

230 Improve we these. Three Cat-calls 7 be the bribe Paolo Antonio Rolli, an Italian Poet, and such men: That altho’ their pens and praises writer of many Operas in that language, which, were as exquisite as they conceit of themselves, partly by the help of his genius, prevailed in yet (even in their own mercenary views) a creaEngland near twenty years. He taught Italian ture unlettered, who serveth the passions, or to some fine Gentlemen, who affected to direct pimpeth to the pleasures of such vain, braggart, the Operas. P.

puft Nobility, shall with those patrons be much ? Bentley his mouth &c.) Not spoken of the more inward, and of them much higher reward! famous Dr Richard Bentley, but of one Tho. ed. Scribl. Bentley, a small critic, who aped his uncle in a 5 With Thunder rumbling from the mustard little Horace. The great one who was intended bowl.] The old way of making Thunder and to be dedicated to the Lord Halifax, but (on a Mustard were the same; but since, it is more change of the Ministry) was given to the Earl of advantageously performed by troughs of wood Oxford; for which reason the little one was with stops in them. Whether Mr Dennis was dedicated to his son the Lord Harley. P. the inventor of that improvement, I know not; [Part om.]

but it is certain, that being once at a Tragedy 3 Welsted] Leonard Welsted, author of the of a new author, he fell into a great passion Triumvirate, or a Letter in verse from Palæmon at hearing some, and cried, “'Sdeath! that is to Cælia at Bath, which was meant for a satire my Thunder." P. (Dennis' tragedy was A, on Mr P. and some of his friends about the year pius and Virginia; and his thunder' was used 1718. He writ other things which we cannot in Macbeth. See note to Essay on Criticism, remember. You have him again in Book III. v. 586.) 169. P. [Part om.) [He was a hanger-on of 7 with a tolling bell;] A mechanical help the Whigs, and a copious writer.)

to the Pathetic, not unuseful to the modern * A youth unknown to Phæbus, &c.] The writers of Tragedy., P. satire of this Episode, being levelled at the base 6 Three Cat-calls ] Certain musical instruflatteries of authors to worthless wealth or great- ments used by one sort of Critics to confound the ness, concludes here with an excellent lesson to Poets of the Theatre, P.

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Of him, whose chati’ring shames the monkey-tribe ;
And his this Drum, whose hoarse heroic bass
Drowns the loud clarion of the braying Ass."

Now thousand tongues are heard in one loud din;
The monkey-mimics rush discordant in;
'Twas chatt'ring, grinning, mouthing, jabb'ring all,
And Noise and Norton, Brangling and Breval,
Dennis and Dissonance, and captious Art,
And Snip-snap short, and Interruption smart,
And Demonstration thin, and Theses thick,
And Major, Minor, and Conclusion quick.
“Hold !

(cry'd the Queen), "a Cat-call each shall win
Equal your merits! equal is your din!
But that this well-disputed game may end,
Sound forth, my Brayers, and the welkin rend."

As, when the long-ear'd milky mothers wait
At some sick miser's triple bolted gate,
For their defrauded, absent foals they make
A moan so loud, that all the guild awake;
Sore sighs sir Gilbert?, starting at the bray,
From dreams of millions, and three groats to pay.
So swells each wind-pipe; Ass intones to Ass;
Harmonic twang! of leather, horn, and brass;
Such as from lab'ring lungs th’Enthusiast blows,
High Sound, attemper'd to the vocal nose;
Or such as bellow from the deep Divine;
There, Webster! peal’d thy voice, and Whitfield 3! thine.
But far o'er all, sonorous Blackmore's strain;
Walls, steeples, skies, bray back to him again,
In Tot'nham fields, the brethren, with amaze,
Prick all their ears up, and forget to graze;
Long Chanc'ry-lane 4 retentive rolls the sound,
And courts to courts return it round and round;
Thames wastes it thence to Rufus' roaring hall 6,
And Hungerford re-echoes bawl for bawl.
All hail him victor in both gifts of song,
Who sings so loudly, and who sings so long 6.

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· Norton,] See ver. 417.-7. Durant Breval, offices of Chancery are kept. The long detention author of a very extraordinary Book of Travels, of Clients in that Court, and the difficulty of and some Poems, See before, note on ver. getting out, is humorously allegorized in these 126. P. [The word 'brangle' (to oscillate; lines. P. another form of brandle, Fr. branler) was con- 5 (Westminster Hall; built by William II. founded with 'wrangle.']

A.D. 1097.) 2 Sir Gilbert (Heathcote, cf. Moral Essays, 6 Who sings so loudly, and who sings so long.] Ep. 111. v. 101].

Ajust character of Sir Richard Blackmore knight, 3 Webster-and Whitfield !) The one the who (as Mr Dryden expresseth it) writer of a News-paper called the Weekly Mis- Writ to the rumbling of the coach's wheels, cellany, the other a Field-preacher. Warburton. and whose indefatigable Muse produced no less (George Whitfield, the early associate of the than six Epic poems: Prince and King Arthur, Wesleys, was born in 1714 and first attracted twenty books; Eliza, ten; Alfred, twelve; the general attention by his preaching at Bristol and Redeemer, six; besides Job, in folio; the whole London in 1736. John Wesley was induced by book of Psalms; the Creation, seven books; his example to commence field-preaching. He Nature of Man, three books; and many more. died in America in 1770.]

'Tis in this sense he is styled afterwards the 4 Long Chanc'ry-lane] The place where the everlasting Blackmore. P. [Part om.]

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This labour past, by Bridewell all descend,
(As morning pray'r and flagellation end) ?
To where Fleet-ditch with disemboguing streams
Rolls the large tribute of dead dogs to Thames,
The king of dykes! than whom no sluice of mud
With deeper sable blots the silver flood.
Here strip, my children! here at once leap in,
“Here prove who best can dash thro' thick and thin,
And who the most in love of dirt excel,
Or dark dexterity: of groping, well.
“Who flings most filth, and wide pollutes around
“The stream, be his the Weekly Journals 4 bound;
“A pig of lead to him who dives the best;
“A peck of coals a-piece shall glad the rest.”

In naked majesty Oldmixon stands 5,
And Milo-like surveys his arms and hands;
Then, sighing, thus, “And am I now three-score ?
“Ah why, ye Gods, should two and two make four?”
He said, and climb'd a stranded lighter's height,
Shot to the black abyss, and plung'd downright.
The Senior's judgment all the crowd admire,
Who but to sink the deeper, rose the higher.

Next Smedley divido; slow circles dimpled o'er
The quaking mud, that clos'd, and op'd no more,
All look, all sigh, and call on Smedley lost;
Smedley” in vain resounds thro' all the coast.

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1 [The scene is on the site of the modern seen by our Author. P. Bridge Struet.)

5 In naked majesty Oldmixon stands,] Mi 2 (As morning pray'r and flagellation end)] JOHN OLDMIXon, next to Mr Dennis, the most It is between eleven and twelve in the morning, ancient Critic of our nation; and unjust censurer after church service, that the criminals are whipt of Mr Addison. In his Essay on Criticism, and in Bridewell.–This is to mark punctually the the Arts of Logic and Rhetoric, he frequently time of the day: Homer does it by the circum- reflects on our Author, But the top of his stance of the Judges rising from court, or of character was a Perverter of History, in that the Labourer's dinner; our author by one very scandalous one of the Stuarts, in folio, and his proper both to the Persons and the Scene of Critical History of England, two volumes, octav. his poem, which we may remember commenced Being employed by Bishop Kennet, in publishing in the evening of the Lord-mayor's day: The the Historians in his Collection, he falsified first book passed in that night; the next morning Daniel's Chronicle in numberless places. He the games begin in the Strand, thenc: along was all his life a virulent Party-writer for hire, Fleet-street (places inhabited by Booksellers); and received his reward in a small place, which then they proceed by Bridewell toward Fleet, he enjoyed to his death. He is here likened ditch, and lastly thro' Ludgate to the City and to Milo, in allusion to Ovid (Metam. Bk. XT. the Temple of the Goddess. P.

v. 229). P. [Part om.] 3-dash thro' thick and thin,-love of dirt- 6 Next Smedley div'd;] The person here dark dexterity] The three chief qualifications mentioned, an Irishman, was author and pubof Party-writers: to stick at nothing, to delight lisher of many scurrilous pieces, a weekly White in flinging dirt, and to slander in the dark by hall Journal, in the year 1722, in the name of guess. P.

Sir James Baker; and particularly whole volumes The Weekly Journals] Papers of news and of Billingsgate against Dr Swift and Mr Pope, scandal intermixed, on different sides and parties, called Gulliveriana and Alexandriana, printed and frequently shifting from one side to the in octavo, 1728. P. other, called the London Journal, British Journal, Jonathan Smedley, a staunch Whig, 281 Daily Journal, &c. the concealed writers of Dean of Clogher. Carruthers (who quotes which for some time were Oldmixon, Roome, his lines The Devil's last game against Swift) Arnall, Concanen, and others; persons never 7 Then * essay'd] A gentleman of genirs

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