MEDITATION XL.

God's tender care.

STILL, O my God, I must repeat my grateful acknowledgment, that the blessings I have received from thee are great beyond measure, and many beyond number; and in talking of these, shall be my most delightful entertainment. Lord, I beseech thee, grant me a mind truly thankful, that my mouth may be ever full of thy praise, and my heart overflow with thy love, for thy infinite goodness to me. Thou seest, my soul, what noble pledges thou hast, and these pledges sufficiently declare the affection of that Lord who gave them. Take care then to preserve thy love and fidelity entire. Let no impure desires, no adulterous lust, pollute or divide thy affection; but keep thee only unto him to the last moment of thy life. If thou wert formerly an harlot, yet now thy virgin innocence is restored. For such is the excellence of his wonderful love, that it restores purity to them that had lost it, and preserves it unblemished to them who are careful to retain it. Let then the greatness of his mercy never slip out of thy mind, but consider how tenderly he loves thee, who never was wanting to thee in any demonstration of his kindness which thy condition required. I cannot but confess, when I reflect upon the constant presence, and the abundance of his mercies towards me, that I am almost tempted to say, that my salvation is his only business and For sure he could not be more tender of my

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safety, more ready to relieve all my distresses, to comfort all my sorrows, to supply all my wants, to guard me in all my dangers, could he be supposed to overlook the exigences of all his other creatures, and confine his good providence to me alone; so watchful does he show himself over all my affairs, so ever present to, nay, ever preventing my earliest wishes. Wheresoever I go, he forsakes me not; wheresoever I am, he stands by me; whatsoever I do, he strengthens and succours me; he is a constant observer of all my behaviour; and such is his goodness, that whatever commendable attempts I make, he works together with me in them, and by the success which I attain gradually, shows me that he condescends to work, not according to the efficacy of his own almighty_power, but in proportion to my weak capacity. These instances make it indisputably clear, that though the imperfection of our present state will not allow us to see his face, yet we cannot be so stupidly blind, as not to be sensible of his presence. A presence, which can no more be concealed, than it can be avoided.

But while my thoughts are engaged upon this subject, I feel a new and unusual pleasure, that makes such strong, such delightful impressions, as seem to transport and carry me out of myself. Methinks I am in an instant changed, and become quite another creature, and joys come flowing in upon me, more exquisite than I am able to express. My conscience is all over satisfaction; the anguish my past sufferings is quite swallowed up, and not so much as a troublesome remembrance of them left behind. My mind is enlarged, my understanding clear and bright, my heart and its affections enlightened and purified; all my desires filled with

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pleasure, and my soul is perfect rapture and triumph. I am no longer here, methinks, but translated; I know not how, nor whither, to some unknown region of bliss: I embrace, as it were, with a most ardent love, some dear object with which I am not yet perfectly acquainted: I hold him fast, and strive all I can, never to part with him more; but still it is with a sort of delightful difficulty, that I struggle not to let that break from me, which of all things I wish to keep for ever in my arms. For in him my soul seems to have found the complement and end of all her desires. This thought creates that eager and inexpressible transport of joy; that she seeks nothing, covets nothing beyond it; but would esteem her happiness complete, could she continue always to be as now she is. What can this heavenly object be, that pours in such rapturous and uncorrupted pleasure? Is it my Beloved? Undoubtedly it can be none but he. It is thus my Lord vouchsafes to visit me. He comes in secret, not to be seen, not to be discerned by any of my senses. He comes to touch me, but not to show me his face. He comes to put me in mind of him, but not to let me perfectly understand him. He comes to me to give me a taste of his sweetness, but not to give me his whole self; to gratify my desires, but not to bestow upon me the fulness of his excellences. However, this is what my condition will admit, what I ought to receive with all the thanks and gladness possible; for it is an assured foretaste of heaven, an inviolable earnest and token of his betrothing me to himself. And blessed, ever blessed be thy mercy, for these assurances, these comfortable foretastes of future happiness: thou, Lord, art good and gracious, and canst not worthily be praised,

for those supporting consolations, whereby thou, who hast promised that my soul shall have a distinct view and full possession of thee hereafter, dost convince her, how sweet that enjoyment, and how precious the promises of it are, by condescending to give her a taste of thee here.

How fervently then oughtest thou, my soul, to love this good God, who hath been so exceeding kind to thee! Nor am I yet, or ever should I be at an end, did I undertake to recount all his benefits. But, to keep close to what thou canst not sure but feel, and see daily and hourly, it shall be next my endeavour to kindle and fan this Divine flame, by putting thee in mind of such as thou carriest about with thee, and art thyself a living monument of. Consider then, what praise, what thanks, what devout zeal are due to Him, who breathed into me the breath of life, brought me to just maturity for birth, and put a difference between me and those, which, perishing by untimely abortions, or strangled at the gate of the womb, seem to have been conceived for death rather than life. It is of his mercy alone, that I am; it is a yet more valuable effect of the same mercy that I am a man; that I was endued with an understanding spirit, which makes a very advantageous distinction between me and brutes. To the same mercy I owe the comely form of this body, and the perfect use of those several organs of sense, so commodiously placed in it. Hence I have eyes for seeing, ears for hearing, nostrils for smelling, hands for handling, a palate for tasting, feet for walking; and, which crowns all the rest, a healthful constitution for my unspeakable ease and comfort. And is not this another most wonderful instance of goodness, that God hath made

such plentiful provision for the service, the entertainment, the delight of the senses; and suited objects so to the organs, that each is proportioned to the use and convenience of that sense, which it was designed to gratify and minister unto? That there are many bright bodies, many delightful sounds, many sweet smells, many grateful relishes, many things that pleasingly affect the touch. For this, no doubt, the good providence of God had in view, when he infused such different qualities into the bodies created by him, that there should be no sense of man, which from thence might not find a delight peculiar to it. And thus, we see, that sight is qualified to perceive one sort of objects; hearing, another; tasting, another; and the touch, a different kind from all the former. The beauty of colours feeds the sight; the harmony of sounds delights our ears, the fragrancy of perfumes entertains our smell, and the delicious relishes our taste. And who can express the vast variety of impressions, with which our senses are gratefully wrought upon These are so many, and so different in each sense singly, that if any one be considered apart, one would think Providence had made it its business, to contrive plenty of amusements and pleasures for that alone. There is so inexpressible a beauty resulting from the diversity of colours to please the eye, and so many charming sounds of different sorts to delight the ear; such a vast usefulness attending those that are articulate, whereby men without any difficulty communicate their thoughts to one another, relate things already past, discourse of the present, predict the future, and disclose those that are secret, and must otherwise continue unknown, that if mankind were left destitute of these conve

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