carefully shun; and whether he ever will be, is altogether uncertain: I know not whether he be a real Christian as yet; or if he be, whether he will possess those qualifications which are requisite for that work: but this I have done; I have mentioned the exercises of my mind to Mr. B. who is a godly man; and if at any future time, within the next five or six years, he should appear a proper object of encouragement for that work, he will readily give him up.

"I felt very tenderly last night and this morning in prayer. I cannot say, God, before whom my fathers Abraham and Isaac did walk; but I can say, God who hath fed me all my life long unto this day; the angel which redeemed me from all evil, bless the lad."

In a very short time, however, the pleasing hopes he had indulged were blighted. "Alas! Alas! (he says,). I have seen that in the conduct of my poor boy which has almost broke my heart." And shortly after he adds, “I perceive I have great unhappiness before me in my sou, whose instability is continually appearing: he must leave London, and what to do with him I know not. I was lately earnestly engaged in prayer for him, that he might be renewed in his spirit and be the Lord's; and these words occurred to my mind, Hear my prayer, O Lord, that goeth not forth

out of feigned lips; and I prayed them over many times."

It remaius for a future day to declare whether or not this prayer on his behalf was answered. His subsequent conduct, however, for many years, was a source of great distress to his friends; and his father's heart especially was 'tried and wrung with anguish.'

In 1797, his father procured him a situation in Kettering; but a restless disposition soon discovered itself, and in 1798 he enlisted in the army; but being understood to be an apprentice he was discharged. Another situation was found for him, but in vain; for in 1799 he enlisted among the marines, where he continued till May 1800. He then seemed to be sensible of his folly; and calling to mind the excellent instructions he had received in his father's house, he bewailed the loss of Sabbaths and religious opportunities; and feeling the misery of his situation, applied to his father to liberate him. This appeal from a returning son to an affectionate parent was not in vain his heart went out to meet him, and he procured his discharge. But the poor young man having acquired a habit of roving, could not brook an application to business, and in about a month left his situation and his friends. On this occasion, his afflicted father thus writes:--

July 21, 1800,-The sorrows of my heart have been increased at different times to a degree almost insupportable: yet I have hoped in God, and do still hope that I shall see mercy for him in the end. The Lord knows I have not sought great things for him, and that I have been more concerned for the wicked course he was following, than on account of the meanness of his taste. O may the Lord bring me out of this horrible pit, and put a new song in my mouth!"

Perceiving there was no hope of his settling to business, his father was desirous of rendering him comfortable in the line of life he had chosen and by the kind interest of a friend procured him a situation in a merchant ship. But being on shore one Lord's-day before he joined the ship, he was impressed as a sailor!

Thus his father's heart was pierced through with many sorrows; but the deepest wound was yet in reserve. In June 1801, it was reported that his poor boy had been guilty of some misdemeanour; had been tried, and sentenced to receive 300 lashes; that he suffered them, and immediately expired!

What feeling heart can forbear the deepest sympathy with my dearest Brother under this overwhelming stroke.

"Oh!... (says he,)... this is heart trouble! In former cases my sorrows found vent in tears;

but now I can seldom weep. A kind of morbid heart-sickness preys upon me from day to day. Every object around me reminds me of him! Ah! he was wicked, and mine eye was not over him to prevent it . . . he was detected, and tried, and condemned, and I knew it not ..... he cried under his agonies, but 1 heard him not...... he expired without an eye to pity, or a hand to help him!.... O Absalom! my son! my son! would I had died for thee, my son!

"Yet, O my soul! let me rather think of Aaron than of David. He held his peace in a more trying case than mine. His sons were both slain, and slain by the wrath of heaven; were probably intoxicated at the time; and all this suddenly, without any thing to prepare his mind for such a trial! Well did he say, Such things have befallen me!"

Thus though he mourned for his son, yet he did not refuse to be comforted; and in a few days his mourning was turned into joy; and who could refrain from rejoicing with him? for this his son was dead, and is alive again!

"Blessed be God! (says he,) I find the above report is unfounded! I have received a letter from my poor boy. Well, he is yet alive, and within the reach of mercy!"

Though this report was altogether erroneous at that time, yet long afterwards he deserted

in Ireland, and suffered so severe a punishment, as to be totally unfitted for the service, by the dreadful effects it had on his health. This was in July 1804,* and several months afterwards he was discharged, when he came to Bristol, and called at my house. As I knew Mr. Fuller would be in London the next day, on his. way into Essex, I sent him forward immediately to meet him, when his father received him with the tenderest compassion, and put him under the care of an eminent physician in town, who had formerly resided in Kettering, and who expressed his hope of soon curing his dysentery, though it had been of so long continuance. Mr. F. was speedily informed that he was getting better; and prepared a situation for him when he should be sufficiently recovered. Yet the poor young man seemed after all his sufferings, as though he could not bear the thought of settling to business. "Alas, (said his father, in a letter to me, dated April 23, 1805,) when he found himself getting better, he asked leave to go to see his uncle at the other end of the town, and returned no more! Where he is now I know not; but should not wonder to hear that he was again in the army or the navy."

It proved to be the case that he had enlisted among the marines, with whom he went to

* See Chap. VIII. p. 396.