We now return to the narrative.

"The other benefit derived from my short space of apprenticeship was this: I was dismissed for gross misconduct, before the whole premium agreed on had been paid: my father resolutely refused to pay the remainder; and my master as decidedly refused to give up my indentures till it was paid: and no compromise was attempted. The claim of my master was, I apprehend, legal: but his retaining my indentures, after I was finally dismissed, was an illegal method of enforcing it, for which, in the opinion of rather high authority, ample damages might have been recovered at the close of the term. The consequence was, that, being nominally this person's apprentice, I could not be placed out with another: and thus I was finally excluded from that profession-for which 1 had been designed, and in which probably I should have succeeded as to this world; but, in that case, the whole history of my life would have been changed."

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My father here subjoins in a note: “ My master lived till after I had published the Force of Truth; and, so far from desiring damages from him, I wished and purposed to express my gratitude to him, as the instrument of God to me for good, by sending him a book or two, accompanied by a letter: but I procrastinated till it was too late, which I have ever since regretted. Second thoughts, in such cases, are seldom best."

It may be added, that he feelingly regretted this omission, even on his dying bed; a circumstance which enforces the admonition, "Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might"-promptly, as well as decidedly.

C

But while my father properly acknowledges, with gratitude, the good of which providence made these events the occasion to him, it may still fairly be remarked, that the measure he met with from man appears to have been hard. To be thus summarily dismissed from his apprenticeship at the end of two months, on the first discovery, as it appears, of an offence, even though a high one; and that by a man who set him the example of immorality in his own conduct, and deprived him of the opportunity of receiving religious instruction and good impressions, on the sabbath; was certainly severe treatment. His future apparent interests in life were also sacrificed, or unwarrantably disregarded, amid the contentions of two high-spirited men. And the degradation and. hardships, to which, as it will be seen, he was subjected through many succeeding years, appear to have been dictated rather by the mortified pride of his family, than by any just principle. Certainly, though providence turned it all for good, and rendered it subservient to the accomplishment of great events, yet the conduct of his father cannot be recommended as a model for imitation under similar circumstances. I would further, however, remark, that, under the whole even of this severe discipline, he was to be congratulated, or even envied, in comparison with such young persons as, in cases of similar misconduct, either escape detection, or are, by the false tenderness of friends, screened from all punishment.

What follows, considered as describing that which probably laid the foundation of diseases under which - he suffered to his dying day, illustrates the remark, often made, that a righteous God frequently punishes

sin with severity, even in those instances in which its eternal consequences are mercifully prevented.

"Immediately on my return home, I was set to do, as well as I could, the most laborious and dirty parts of the work belonging to a grazier. On this I entered at the beginning of winter; and, as much of my father's farm consisted of low land, which was often flooded, I was introduced to scenes of hardship, and exposed to many dangers from wet and cold, for which my previous habits had not prepared me. In consequence I was frequently ill, and at length suffered such repeated and obstinate maladies, (especially the ague, and effects following from it,) that my life was more than once despaired of. Yet a kind of indignant, proud self-revenge, kept me from complaining of hardship: though of reproach, and even of reproof, I was impatient to the greatest degree of irascibility. “I had now many serious thoughts of God and of eternity, and every illness produced a sort of paroxysm of religion in which, having prayed for pardon in an earnest but ignorant manner, I felt satisfied that I should be happy if I died; though, as soon as I was restored to health, all my religion vanished as the morning cloud!"

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Another paragraph from the Force of Truth may further illustrate what is here briefly stated." Being of a reflecting turn, and much alone, aware of the uncertainty of life, I was disquieted with continual apprehensions, that the more convenient season" for repentance, to which I looked forward, " would never arrive: especially as, through an unconfirmed state of health, I had many warnings, and near prospects of death and eternity. For a long time I entertained

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no doubt that impenitent sinners would be miserable for ever in hell: and, at some seasons, such amazing reflections upon this awful subject forced themselves into my mind, that I was overpowered by them, and my fears became intolerable. At such times my extemporary cries for mercy were so earnest and persevering, that I was scarcely able to give over; though, at others, I lived without prayer of any sort. Yet in my darkest hours, though my conscience was awakened to discover more and more sinfulness, there remained a hope that I should one day repent and turn to God. If this hope were from myself, it was a horrid presumption; but the event makes me willing to acknowledge a persuasion that it was from the Lord: for, had it not been for this hope, I should probably have given way to temptations, which frequently assaulted me, to put an end to my own life, in proud discontent with my lot in this world, and in mad despair about another."

CHAPTER II.

FROM HIS APPRENTICESHIP TO HIS

ORDINATION,

THE narrative now proceeds: "After a few unsuccessful attempts, my father gave up all thoughts of placing me out in any other way: and for above nine years I was nearly as entire a drudge as any servant or labourer in his employ; and almost as little known beyond the circle of immediate neighbours. My occupation was generally about the cattle, and particularly in the spring season, it consisted in following the ewes great with young. In this service I learned habits of hardiness in encountering all sorts of weather, (for the worse the weather the more needful was it that I should be with the ewes,) which have since proved useful to me: and though I was not kept from learning many vices, I was out of the way of acquiring habits of ease and indulgence, as I should otherwise probably have done.

"My situation, however, necessarily led me to associate with persons of the lowest station of life, and wholly destitute of religious principle-in all ranks the grand corrective, and in this rank almost the sole restraint upon character and manners. These persons tried to please me with flatteries, and to inflame still more the indignancy of spirit with which I rebelled