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i MEMOIR

.. ?" OF
MR. STEPHEN HALLETT GOLDING.
i s (Concluded from page 274.)

Ir appears that, after this, when conversing with his friends he expressed some uneasy apprehensions, as he could not date: his conversión at any particular period, or trace that regular progress of the divine work on his heart which some authors and other Christians bave described'; and hence he was ready to fear that his former hopes would be found delusive. He said, that he had ever been sensible of the importance of religion ; but that, when there is a considerable knowledge of the truths of the gospel, it was d fficult to distinguish between that and the work of the Spirit;. 'bul,' he added, that, utterly disclaiming all hópe on th ground of personal mèrit, we must all, as siņners, whether greater or less, be saved in the same way, through the righteousness of Christ.“ But, whatever uncertainty he might have felt on this occasion, at another time he told his father, That he had that day bad such a view of the love of Christ in dying for sinners, and such a belief of his interest in it, as was alnıost too much for him. He thought that he could not have borne more."

He was concerned that, in consequence of being exceodingly nervous, he was prevented from always discovering that exem. plary patience and composure, for which he had generally been so remarkable. 'This he would frequently lament, as he thought it : might have an appearance of Laoit murmuring against God, which grieved him exceedingly.

A few weeks previous to his death, he said, That, on looking back on his past life, he wondered what his ardour had been directed towards objects so comparatively triff ng, and that his mind had not been more fixed upon the cause of Christ, the promoting of which he now considered as the grant object of lite. He added, that, if he felt a wish to live, it was that he might devote himself inore entirely to God, and testify his love to that

Saviour who had shewn such love to him. At the same time he repeated this verse of Dr. Doddridge:

"'Tis to my Saviour I would live,

To hiin who for my random died;

Nor could untainted Eden give . . " - Such bliss as blossoms at his side.' My views,' said he, upon the subject of Redemption, are very different now from what they once were. I once thought too much stress was laid on it by many; but now I find it to be the grand pillar of Christianity. What a mercy is it,' he added,

that all is done for us, and that we have nothing to do but to accept of salvation! When we are enabled to rely entirely on Christ, then it is that we taste the comforts of religion.'

When some person had been speaking of the blessing of health, 'I do not think,' said be, a state of affliation the most undesirable for a Christian. Far from it. I trust I shall ever have reason to bless God for this affliction, and for all bis mysterious dealings with me, by which he has brought me to a much greater knowledge of himself.

On its being suggested to him, that it was a mercy he was not in great pain, and still more that his mind was so supported, be said, “ Yes; but I have been much distressed the past night; yet I was enabled again to cast myself on my Saviour; and, I trust, that he has accepted me. I have given myself up to him before ; and, I trust, he will not now forsake me. I have at times felt my faith so strong, that I have thought that, if an angel from Heaven had come to me, with an assurapee of my salvation, I could not bave more firmly believed it.' He then repeated, with peculiar animation, the following verse from Dr. Doddridge:

On thy dear cross I fix mine eyes,

Then raise them to thy seat,
Till love dissolve my in most soul

At my Redeemer's feet.'
Such, added he, has been my experience.'

When his friends said that thếy had hoped it would have · been the will of God to lengthen his life, but that it would be

selfish to detain him here with such happiness in view, Yes,' he replied, I have no wish to live. Heaven is a glorious place! My prayer is, That I may possess, not merely a firm reliance, but a triumphant hope in the prospect of death! -- this, I trust, my heavenly Father will grant me!'

On his being informed by his father, that his medical attend. ants had pronounced his case to be bopeless, he expressed sur. prize; but without any change of countenance. He said that, though he had, for several days, believed himself to be in a very critical state, he had looked forward to weeks, or, perhaps, months of longer life; - 'but I have a bright prospect,' he added, beyond the grave ! and, though I feel myself a rile,

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unworthy sinner, yet I trust that God has accepted me, through
my blessed Redeemer. I have felt the sweet drawings of his
Spirit, and the assurances of his love. Yes; Jesus is mine, and
I am his! I know that he has loved me! - I regret that I have
done so little for him in life, and had hoped to be raised
up, that I might honour him by some eminent services. I have
no wish to live but for this end, that I may glorify that God
who has done so much for me. He then spoke again of the delighi-
ful view that he bad of the love of the Saviour in dying for him,
to which we have alluded in the former part of this narrative.
• After supplicating the divine mercy,' said he, with particular
importunity, going through the whole work of redemption, and
applying it to myself, then it was that, in a most remarkable
manner, I felt the Spirit bearing witness with my spirit, that I
was one of the children of God; and so overpowering was it,
that I could not but wecp for joy. Though I trust that, long
before, I had yielded myself up to God, and had experienced
at tines his love shed abroad in my heart, yet it was not con-
stant; but, since that time, I do not know that I have enter-
tained one doubt; and I trust that my Redeemer will grant me
Iris grace, to hold on to the end. He will never break the bruised
reed, nor quench the smoking flax.'

When one of his sisters said that his friends only had reason for sorrow, he replied, " And why you, my dear? Follow on, and you shall attain.' He then took each of them by the hand, saying that this affliction had greatly endeared them all to him: and expressed his earnest hope that they might all meet around the throne, and join in praising Him who sits on the throne, and the Lamb for ever and ever. There,' said he, “I shall meet my dear mother and brother, and all our relations, who are now in glory.' He then repeated the 280th Hymn of Dr. Doddridge, with a lively emotion, and particularly the following verse:

• Yes; thou hast lov'd this sinful worin,
.. Hast given ihysil, for me;
Hast brought me from cternal death,

Naii'd to the bloody tree.' .
He regretted that he had not been earlier apprized of his situ.
ation, as, be said, it had prevented his enjoying the com-
pany of his Christian friends, and many delightful seasons of
communion with God; that it had led him to spend those hours
in attention to his health, which should have been devoted to the
service of his Redeemer ; but I bless Goil,' he added, the great
work is not now to be done! I ran call God my Father; Christ
my Redecmer. I have often thought of the last memorandum in
George's Diary, in wbich he speaks of the love of the Saviour as
expressive of my own feelings. He then quuied the following
extract from it: I had to-day, in the house of God, so clear
a vicw of the love of Christ in dying for sinners, that I could

truly say with the apostle, “The love of Christ constraineid. me.”

A few hours after, he, conversed with his brother in the laj. guage of joyful expectation. No one,' says be, who has tasted of the joys of Heaven, . would wish to come back again to earth,' a lopting, as expressive of his own experience, these animated lines in Dr. Watts's Miscellanies :: ::

* Weak as my zeal is, ret my zeal is pure;.
It hears the trying furnace. Love divine .
Constrains me: I ain thine. Incarnate love",
Has seiz'd, and holds me in Almighty arins.
Here's my salvation, my eternal hope,
Amidst the wreck of worlds and dying nature

I am the Lord's, aird he for ever mine!".. During the remainder of the day, though he suffered much from a fresh hemorrhage, he discovered singular patience, not utiering a murmur or complaint, but calmly acquiescing in the sovereiga pleasure of God.

Complaining one morning to bis friends that his communion · with Gol had, during the past night, been suspended, they en deavoured to comfort him, by ascribing it to the effect of bis disorder. "Ah!' said he, do not talk so. Is not that an evil to be lamented, which has occasioned my heavenly Father to withdraw the sensible assurances of his love? Is bot that an evily to remain without communion with my God!but,' added

love for a time, my Saviour will return again! I know that he will return; and though weeping may endure for a night, joy will come in the morning.' Then, lifting up his eyes, he said, 0, my heavenly Father! can such an unworthy sinner as 1, hope for thy favour ? Never, but for thy unchangeable love!

never, but for thy boundless mercy! Though our feelings vary, thou changest not! Thou wilt never leave those who have felt so much of thy gracions presence!' Throughout this day he continued in a very devotional temper; and, finding that it was the Sabbath, he said, ' If this be my last Sabbath on earth, I shall spend an eternal Sabbath in Heaven.' When his father and sister were moving the bed-chair for him, he said, “These bones, which are now moved in this chair, will shortly be mouldering in the tomb' He then enlarged on the superior happiness which the soul would experience when dismissed from this state

infirmity, and repeated an expression similar to what he had before uttered, that he had wished to honour God by some signal service in life; . but if he choose,' he added, “to take me from this state of pain and sickness, to serve him in perfection above, it will be infinitely better, and I am sure I shall not repine.'

He frequently spoke, in the course of the day, in the same picasing manner ; but when he awoke, about il at night, he expressed, with perfect composure and clearness, such emotions of jowy for more than an hour, ibat he appearcd to be like one on the

confines of glory; and, it is to be regretted, that the feelings of
his friends were so overpowered; ás to prevent their retaining bis
rapturous expressions. "No part of his dying testimony was
more impressive, His appeals to Heaven, as a test of his past
experience, were particularly solemn and affecting. In the full
and triumphant hope of future blessedness; he repeated, with a
small alteration, the following verses from a hymn of Dr. Dod.
dridge:
.... Jesus, my soul's eternal there .

My transport and my trust;
Jewels to thee arc gaudy toys,

And gold is sordid dust.
I'll speak the honours of thy name

Witb my last lab'ring breath;
Then, speechless, clasp thee in my arms; .

The Antidote of death.' - While uttering these words, he clasped his hands and raised his eyes, with a countenance expressive of his heavenly transport.

The next morning, seeing his sisters by his bed-side, he said, Through the goodness of God, we live to behold each other again! - this is a mercy! but, if it had pleased him, I should have been glad to have been taken the past night.' His sisters replied, That God would take him in his own time, which is the best. It is,' said he ; and, in the mean time, I hope to enjoy • communications of his grace, by continual intercourse with Hea

ven; for, in proportion as we maintain habitual intercourse with God, we shall taste the consolations of his Spirit.' Late in the evening he called them to his bed-side, saying, "My time is now come.' He then took eacb of their hands, and committed them most affectionately to the care of their heavenly Father.

On Tuesday afternoon, feeling the approaches of death, he broke out in tbese rapturous expressions : - I find now it is no delusion! My hopes are well founded! I shall soon join the blissful com papy around the throne! Eye bath not seen, nor car beard, neither hath it entered into the heart of man to con- . ceive the glory I shall shortly partake of! Read your Bible!

I shall read mine no more! no more need it! When his bro: - ther said to him, " You seem to enjoy foretastes of Heaven," ! O!' replied he, this is no longer a foretaste! this is Heaven! I not only feel the climate, but I breathe the fine ambrosial air of Heaven, and soon shall enjoy the company! Can this be dying? This body seems no longer to belong to the soul! It appears only as a curtain that covers it; and soon I shall drop this curtain, and be set at liberty!' Then, putting his hand to bis breast, he exclaimed, “I rejoice to feel these bones give way!

repeating it, I rejoice to feel these bones give way, as it tells me I shall shortly be with my God in glory!'

Notwithstanding these supports and enjoyments, our young friend was not permitted to pass through the valley of the Bhadow of death'undisturbed. Tac powers of darkness inolested

He the theme .consolations air habituercourse with enjoy

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