1685. Will, as he was pleafed to manifeft it to me, fo that thereby fome Change was wrought on me, both inwardly and outwardly.

And I then began to delight in Reading and Sobriety, which before were irkfome to me: And when I read the holy Scriptures, I defired that God would open them to my Understanding, which he did to my Edification many Times. I alfo begged earnestly of the Lord, that he would be pleas'd to be with me, and make me like to thofe his Children and Servants, of whom I read in the holy Scriptures, who faithfully ferved him all their Days. And when I read of the Crucifixion of our bleffed Lord and Saviour JESUS CHRIST, it would break my Soul into Tenderness. I thought it was enough to awaken and humble any Soul that was well-meaning, and had any Senfe of the Power, Love, and Grace of Chrift. Thus I went on for several Years, feeling that Peace which paffeth natural Understanding, which many Times accompanied my poor and needy Soul: And being advanced 1690. to about 14 or 15 Years of Age, I remember that I used to fhun the Crofs of fpeaking in the plain Language (which I always read in the holy Scriptures) Southwark, to those whom I converfed with, except my Father and Mother, who would not allow me to fpeak otherwife: I was convicted in my Confcience that it was not right to play the Hypocrite after that Manner; and on a certain Time I had Occafion to speak with an Officer, a great Man in our Neighbourhood, and niy Heart moved within me for fear I fhould fhun the Crofs of Chrift; For it was Chrift's Language to all, as we may read in the New Teftament; and the Scriptures, from Genefis to the Revelations, fpeak Thee and Thou, to a fingle Perfon in a general Way,

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Thames,

So I took up the Crofs, and faid Thee to him; and he was much affronted, and faid, Thee! what doft tbou Thee me for? I foberly asked him, if he did not fay-Thee to his Maker in his Prayers? and whe

ther

ther he was too good, or too great, to be fpoke to 1690. in the fame Language in which he addrefs'd the Al-S mighty? Unto which he made no Reply, but feem'd to fall from his Paffion into Admiration, as one fmitten in himself. And he bore me Refpect ever after; and I greatly rejoiced that I was preferved faithful. Tho' it may look like a little Thing to fome, yet I found it good (as the Scripture faith) not to defpife the Day of Small Things.

About the twentieth Year of my Age, I was pref- 1694. fed and carried aboard a Veffel belonging to a Man of War. I was put down into the Hold in the Dark, not having any Thing to lie upon but Cafks; and what made it worse to me, I was among wicked, debauched Men; and as we were fhut up in Darkness, fo was their Converfation dark and hellifh. In the Morning (for which I longed more than the Watchmen) the Lieutenant called us up on Deck, and examined us whether we were willing to ferve the King. He called me to him, and afked me, If I were willing to ferve his Majefty? I anfwer'd, that I was willing to ferve him in my Bufinefs, and according to my Confcience; but as for War or Fighting, CHRIST had forbid it, in his excellent Sermon on the Mount; and for that Reafon I could not bear Arms, nor be inftrumental to destroy or kill Men. Then the Lieutenant looked on me, and on the People, and faid, Gentlemen, what shall we do with this Fellow? be fwears he will not Fight. The Commander of the Veffel made Anfwer, No, no! he will neither Swear nor Fight. Upon which they turn'd me on Shore. I was thankful that I was delivered out of their Hands; and my tender Parents were glad to see me again.

Now as I grew in Years, the World began to take too much Root in me; and my unwearied Enemy would tell me that it was lawful enough (and indeed I fee that he hurts many with lawful Things, with whom

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1694. whom he knoweth the unlawful Things will not take) and here I had been loft if God had not been gracious to me. But he, in whofe Prefence I delighted, withdrew, and deprived me of that Enjoyment which was graceful and comfortable above all Things to my Soul. Then did I pray, with Tears, O that it might be with me as it was at other Times before! and I was willing to let the World go, rather than Grace and God's Glory. The Pfalmift faith, No good Thing will be with bold from them that walk uprightly, Plal. lxxxiv. Verse 11.

1695. About this Time there was a great Concern on my Mind, rightly to diftinguish between the Voice of Chrift, and the Whifperings of Satan, and thus it open'd to me: That Chrift, the Truth, always fpeaketh Good, and for a good End, and that there is divine Life to the Soul in this Speaking; but the Devil never fpeaks Good, unlefs fometimes for a bad End, and then not Good in Reality, only colour'd with a good or fair Shew.

And keeping under this Exercife, the Lord appear'd to me again, and many Times refresh'd my Heart with his Goodnefs. And when I was in my Business amongst Men, I did witness the holy Ghoft, the Comforter, to be near me; which was more to me than all the World, or the Riches, Glory, and Beauty of it; the Love of God being fo fweet to my Soul and Spirit, my Breathings, Prayers, and Supplications, were to the Lord, that my Neighbours, Acquaintance, and Relations, might alfo partake of the like precious Faith and Love which I enjoy'd; and that the Children of Men might answer that great and good End for which the Lord did create them; which is, that Glory, Honour and Praife, might afcend and be given to him.

I had fuch a Senfe and Fear of Dishonouring God, that I often, with Tears, cry'd, Never let me live to dishonour Thee. Oh! it had been better for me, that

I had never been born, or my Mother's Womb had 1695. been my Grave, than that I fhould live to difhonour Thee, or wilfully reproach the Name of Chrift, who, with the Father, is only worthy of divine Honour.

In this Concern I felt the Gofpel Power of our Lord Jefus Chrift to work upon my Soul, and the Word of God was as a Seed in my Heart, growing and opening in me, fpeaking to me, and making my Understanding fruitful in the Things of his Kingdom; and in that Ability which was given me of God, through his Grace and holy Spirit, I exhorted People to Repentance and Amendment of Life; and I always humbly defir'd the Help and divine Influence of God's eternal Word therein. Oh! I did fervently pray, that I might minifter the Gospel in the Power of Jefus ; for I clearly difcern'd in the Light of the Son of God, that all Miniftring out of Chrift's Power, was neither edifying nor efficacious unto Souls: Therefore I did earnestly befeech God for the Continuance of the Gift of his Spirit, that I might be enabled to preach the Gospel in the Power of Chrift Jefus. The Concern that was upon me on this Account at that Time, is hard to be exprefs'd in Words.

The latter End of the Year 1695, my Father fent me into Effex, on fome Bufinefs, which, when I had accomplished, I vifited fome Meetings of Friends there, and my Mind being much affected with the Apprehenfion of an impending Storm, (the Nation being about this Time threatened with an Invafion from France, in favour of the late King James, fo that there was Expectation of much Bloodshed and Confufion in the Land) I wrote a Letter to my Parents, and another to Friends of the Evening-meeting (kept Weekly at my Father's House) expreffing my great Thankfulness to the Almighty, in Remembrance of the many precious Vifitations of divine Love and Favour we had been made Partakers of, to the uniting our Hearts to him, and to one another; and my earneft Prayers

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1695. and Supplications, that we might be preferved in true Love, and the Unity of the Spirit, which is the Bond of everlasting Peace, and that the World might be made fenfible of this true Peace, which abounds in those who love and fear the Lord, and truly believe in the Name of Jefus: Ob! furely they would then depart from Sin, and abandon Iniquity, by which they incur the Wrath of the Lord, and provoke the just One to Anger; fo that the Line of Confufion feems to be ftretched over the City and Nation, and the Eye of the Faithful feeth it to the Grief of their Souls. Yet the Mercy of the Lord, even of the just God (who will render a juft Reward to every one according to his Deeds done in the Body) is ftill banded forth to the Land. Ob that the Inhabitants thereof would confider their Ways, and be wife, and turn to the Lord with unfeigned Repentance, while the Day of Mercy lafteth, before it be faid, Now it is hid from thine Eyes, for the Lord, even the God and Father of Spirits, bath faid, My Spirit fhall not always ftrive with Man, for that he alfo is Flesh, Gen. vi. 3.

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On the Expiration of my Apprenticeship, having served my Father faithfully feven Years, I entered more ftrongly into Covenant with my heavenly Father and Mafter, to ferve him all my Days, thro' his Affistance; and was foon after drawn forth, in the Spirit and Love of Chrift, to vifit the Meetings of Friends Weftward from London, viz. thro' Surry, Suffex, Hampshire, Wiltshire, Devonshire, and Cornwall, to the Land's End; in which Journey I was accompanied by William Hornould. At one of our Meetings at Falmouth in Cornwall, two Men (called Gentlemen) came from the Inn to hear the Strangers; and after Meeting, they faid they could take their Oaths that I was a Jefuit, and that they had heard me preach in a Romih Chapel in France; which was utterly false : For I never was in France in my Life: Befides, had I been