not expect to find in the motherless children of whom she is about to take charge, that full flow of love which none but a mother can inspire, which none but a mother ought to look for. Affection cannot spring up in the hearts of children at a father's command, nor ought it to be required. It must be the natural result of kindnesses received, and of comforts enjoyed, by them.

The step-mother, if properly alive to the important position she holds, will make it her first object to secure the respect of her adopted children by judicious treatment, and by evincing, in all her domestic arrangements, an anxiety to promote their happiness and welfare. She will be more desirous that they should regard her as a kind and tender friend, than that they should obey her because she has been invested by their father with the name and authority of a mother. She will strive to convince them that she loves them, for the sake of that father on whom she has bestowed her hand and her heart; that she pities them, because they have been deprived of the mother who watched over their tender infancy, and trained their early childhood. She will tell them that though she may not be able entirely to fill the place of the dear parent they have lost, she hopes to be able to make them more happy than they were whilst without maternal She will explain to them that, though they may have to submit to more restrictions, and to act with greater regularity, than they have lately been accustomed to, they may be assured that it will ultimately contribute to their happiness.

care.

A proper understanding of this kind will be absolutely needful between the older children of a family and the newly-arrived wife, in order to secure permanent peace. To those who are too young to know the loss they have sustained, it would be unkind to explain it let them regard as a mother her who takes upon herself the duties and responsibilities of the maternal relation.

She who intends conscientiously to act a mother's part towards her husband's children, will be as wishful to know how to perform her important duties as a mother would be. She will find no great difficulty in securing the affection of the younger children, and she will endeavour to turn this feeling to account in their early moral and intellectual training.

We warn young mothers to guard against making their children mere playthings on the one hand, or idols on the other. These are errors into which there is no danger of step-mothers falling, and thus far they have an advantage. They are able to enforce obedience and exercise discipline, without that sacrifice of feeling from which the real mother too often shrinks if they have to watch over themselves, it is that they may avoid either a too stringent exercise of the power with which they are invested, or a total indifference to the welfare of their charge.

But the step-mother must not only avoid evil, but she must shun its appearance in her treatment of her husband's children. The discipline which would be thought highly praiseworthy in a mother, which would be spoken of as a proof of her judgment, firmness, and self-command, would in her substitute be regarded as severe and cold-hearted. The world in general is inclined to attribute to the latter, motives the very reverse of what they would attribute to the former, even under exactly similar circumstances. The father also is apt to think, if he be too prudent to say, "Their own mother would not have been so strict," forgetting that he might have married a woman of whom he would have been constrained to exclaim, "Their own mother would have kept them in better order.”

If such be the difficulties which the step-mother has to encounter in training the younger children of a former wife, what must she meet with from the older ones? The writer's attention has been directed to this subject for several years; and the result of her own observation, and the opinions of those on whose judgment she places great confidence, is, that wherever it is practicable, the older children of the family should be sent to school for a short time. It frequently happens that there is a great difference between the personal and domestic habits of the children and their new relative. If the father have made a judicious second choice, the probability is, that he has selected a woman whose habits of neatness and order are sadly at variance with the habits of disorder and irregularity, which have crept into his household during the illness of his former wife, and the period in which he has had no sufficiently influential person at the head of his family.

It is much easier to conceive than to describe the collision which takes place when a second wife enters a household, where disorder and untidiness reign rampant. She begins zealously and actively to regulate and restrain, and is immediately reproached with destroying all comfort. Doubtless she may destroy the comfort which results from sloth and self-indulgence; but she hopes in their place to introduce the more enlivening and permanent comfort which results from industry and activity. Here let her beware how she proceeds: she treads on slippery ground, and must act with extreme caution. She should endeavour to convince the judgment of those who are old enough to be influenced by reason, as well as to work on their self-love, by pointing out the many advantages which would follow a thorough reformation of domestic and personal habits. She must be content to sap and mine, before she attempts to overthrow; or in striving to raze the superstructure which sloth and selfishness have reared, she may destroy her own happiness, and prevent her future usefulness.

The difficulties of her position will be lessened by placing the older children at a well-conducted boarding-school, where their habits, and morals, as well as their intellectual powers, will be carefully cultivated. Such schools, we hesitate not to state, may now be found in every English county; schools conducted by men and women of education, sense, and piety, who strive conscientiously to perform their onerous duties as in the sight of God, as well as of man.

The children thus removed from a home which has too long been neglected, find themselves placed in a situation where they can draw no invidious comparisons. All are treated alike, and no one can say, "It would not have been thus had my own mother lived." They see clearly that, without the restrictions and regulations which exist at school, there could be no comfort either for teachers or pupils; and they are led to conclude, that the good habits they were desired to form at home, would have tended to promote their own and others' happiness. Their visits to home during the holidays will now be looked forward to with pleasure: what seemed superfluous strictness before they left it, will now be regarded as comparative relaxation.

If the step-mother be truly alive to her own welfare, and desirous to promote that of her husband and his children, she will not neglect, during these visits, to cultivate the affection, and secure the esteem, of the children. She will encourage them to look forward with pleasure to the period when their education will be completed, and they will again become permanent residents at home. She will point out to them the various means

by which they may be able to add to the general stock of domestic happiness, and by which they may promote their own interests, and the wellbeing of the whole family. If she be a woman of enlightened piety, she will impress upon their youthful minds the necessity of seeking the only true source of peace and joy, even in that renewal of the heart, and that subjugation of the will, which true religion can alone effect. She will strive to convince them, that though the loss they have sustained may never be entirely supplied, they may with confidence regard her as, next to their father, their most faithful and most judicious friend.

It is possible that a second wife may be introduced to a family where some of its members are too old to be sent to school. A new class of difficulties is here presented; and grace and wisdom from above are indeed needed in order to overcome them,-nor these alone. She must now seek the cordial co-operation of her husband; not that he may exercise his authority, and command the outward forms of respect only; these will not suffice to satisfy the heart, or to secure that cordial good understanding without which there will be no real happiness. If there be sons only, there will be little danger of collision: they will be occupied with business or with study, and will not be sorry to see an amiable and intelligent woman added to the social party. But with daughters it will be very different, especially if they have for some time managed their father's domestic affairs, and presided at his table. They will feel the introduction of a second wife as a usurpation of their power and privileges; they will no longer stand first either with their father or with visiters; and it will require much self-command for them to retire with grace into the shade. A judicious step-mother will, under such circumstances, endeavour so to arrange domestic duties, as to give to each her appropriate share; so that the daughters may still feel themselves of importance in the household, and be prevented from suffering that ennui and listlessness which most surely lead to discontent.

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But there is more frequently cause of complaint from the unwillingness grown-up daughters to take their proper share of domestic duties; and the new wife is mortified to find that she must either content herself with seeing her husband's house in confusion, or be the servant of those who ought to be her cheerful and active coadjutors. While she is desirous of pleasing only the husband of her choice, they wish to be pleasing to all; while she is content to smile at home, they are anxious to shine abroad, and gladly leave to a stranger the duty of attending to their father's comfort, and to the training of their younger brothers and sisters. It will require a clear head and a steady hand to guide aright under these circumstances. The desired changes must be effected gradually. Let the father join his wife in requiring that judicious works be read aloud in the hours of leisure, and freely commented upon by all parties. It seems almost invidious to mention only one of the authors who have written on the duties of the female sex ; but Mrs. Ellis's "Women of England," and her "Daughters of England," are works so peculiarly adapted to the case in point, that we cannot forbear strongly to recommend them. Let me advise the new mother not to talk at her step-daughters; but kindly point out what she thinks wrong in their conduct, and induce them, if possible, to join with her in striving to correct their bad habits. Let her also avoid speaking of their faults to strangers: nothing will be more difficult for them to forgive, than having their characters discussed in their absence, or

in the presence of indifferent persons. They know that they have it in their power to make their new relative uncomfortable; and they will not fail to exercise that power if provoked to it. A strong appeal may be made to the young people, so circumstanced, on behalf of the father, whose happiness must be destroyed if he see the wife of his choice treated with unmerited disrespect and neglect.

Shall we be searching too deeply into the springs of action in the female breast, if we remind the young step-mother that there is a danger of her feeling jealous of any real or supposed personal superiority in her adopted daughters? It is possible that such a feeling may unconsciously exist: let her, therefore, examine her own heart, and carefully guard against a passion so destructive of peace.

Let us also warn the step-mother against partiality towards one or more of her adopted charge. There is so great a difference in the tempers and dispositions of children, that their own mother has frequently to struggle against this evil. Some are so lovely in person, so amiable in temper, so noble in spirit, that it is impossible not to admire and love them. Others are so much the reverse of this picture, that it becomes, even with parents, a point of duty to cultivate a feeling of love towards them. We do not require impossibilities. It is not likely that a step-mother should feel the same affection towards one who repulses all her approaches, and defies her authority, which she must feel for one who receives her with respectful kindness, and contributes as much as possible to her comfort; but if she cannot govern her feelings, she may control her words and actions; and she will find it her best and wisest plan to show no partiality whatever.

But it is not from the children of her adoption, with all their faults and all their perversities; it is not from the watchful jealousy of her husband, who is perhaps apprehensive that she may either neglect her duty, or stretch her prerogative too far; it is not from the envious, malignant world, who mark her every action, and misconstrue her every motive; that the step-mother needs to apprehend danger: it is from the purest emotions of her own heart that she has most cause for fear.

It is when she becomes indeed a mother, when she presses the dear object of her love to her throbbing bosom, that she has need to tremble, to doubt herself, to pray for grace and strength to perform her duty to those whom she now feels she never has loved, never can love, with all the tenderness, all the devotedness, of a mother.

Let not the step-mother think we speak too strongly of the difficulty she has now to encounter. We have thought it needful to guard mothers against exciting jealousy in the first-born, by the caresses lavished on a second infant. How much more, then, will it be needful for her to exercise caution, lest the children of another should think themselves slighted, for one she feels to be most emphatically her own!

We are not so ignorant of the workings of a mother's heart, as to advise that any efforts should be made to check the full flow of her feelings towards the helpless object of her love: we only warn her against the injudicious display of those feelings. Let the mother indulge the natural impulses of her heart; let her exult in the new and delightful feeling her infant inspires; let her thankfully enjoy the happiness which almost overwhelms her; yes, let her confess to herself that she loves her own child infinitely more than she ever loved the child of another; but here let her rest. She must on no account indulge a wish that her husband may love

her child more than his others: the wish, even, is sinful, and may tend to awful consequences. How often has the almost heart-broken husband been heard to exclaim, "My second wife was kind to my children till she herself became a mother!" And how much more frequently have the oppressed or slighted children been constrained to say, "Now that she has children of her own, we are evidently an encumbrance!"

It is true that the firmness and affection of a father may shield his offspring from open oppression; but no care on his part can guard them from the coldness and indifference, which is more galling to a susceptible mind than positive unkindness. But these things ought not to be. While the young mother feels how dearly she loves her own infant, she ought to cherish increased sympathy for those whose loss she can now appreciate: she knows that no one could fully supply her place, and should resolve so to act towards her charge as she would wish another to act towards her own child, should she be removed from it.

One of the most fearful effects of a second family is, the entire or partial alienation of the father's affections from the children of his former wife. Who can foretell the result of woman's influence on man, when that woman is the wife of his bosom, the mother of his younger children? The cares of business occupy the father's attention during the day; and if, on his return in the evening, he is required to listen to the dark catalogue of offences committed by his first children, while he is cheered with the praises and soothed by the caresses of the others, is it to be wondered at that he should in time look upon the one party as a painful burden, and on the other as a source of consolation and delight?

But we are not now addressing the wilfully unjust and malignant: we could scarcely hope that so feeble a pen as ours could reach hearts so hardened. It is our more pleasing duty to guide those who conscientiously desire to perform the duties which devolve upon them in their new relation. To her who, under these circumstances, has become a mother, who knows, by actual experience, what is meant by a mother's love,—we would say, Do not, by any influence of yours, deprive the motherless children you have promised to protect of the greatest earthly blessing they can enjoy,—a father's love.

But let not the step-mother look only on the dark and cloudy side of her prospects. An incident has been mentioned to the writer since she commenced this chapter, which is calculated to encourage and stimulate this important class of society in the faithful discharge of their duty.

A young lady was united to a gentleman who had been left with one daughter by his former wife. The lady treated this child with judicious kindness, secured for her a liberal education, and at a proper age initiated her into the duties of domestic life. It need scarcely be added, that the adopted child loved her step-mother, and strove to return her kindness by every attention it was in her power to render. In the course of a few years, a second family surrounded the domestic hearth, and were treated with tenderness by the oldest daughter, more especially when she perceived that their mother's health was failing. That fond mother died, and left her own motherless children to the care of her step-daughter. And well did the faithful and attached girl repay the kindness which had been exercised towards her. She supplied a mother's place to the young family, saw them well brought up under her own care, and most of them comfortably settled in life. "Cast thy bread upon the waters, and it shall be found after many

days."