See Phoebus now, as once for Phaeton, Has mask'd his face; and put deep mourning on; And the dull fteeds ftalk o'er the melancholy round *. Of Prince Arthur's foldiers drinking. While rich Burgundian wine, and bright Champaign, Chafe from their minds the terrors of the main †. (whence we also learn, that Burgundy and Champaign make a man on shore defpife a storm at sea), Of the Almighty encamping his regiments. He funk a vast capacious deep, 'here he his liquid regiments does keep. Thither the waves file off and make their way,· To form the mighty body of the fea; Where they incamp, and in their station ftand, Of two armies on the point of engaging. All perfectly agreeable to the prefent customs and beft" fashions of our metropolis. But the principal branch of the alamode is the PRURIENT, a ftile greatly advanced and honoured of late by the practice of persons of the first quality; and, by the encouragement of the ladies, not ur fuccessfully introduced even into the drawing room. Indeed its incredible progrefs and conquefts may be compared to those of the great Seforis, and are every where known by the fame marks, the images of the genital parts of men or women * Amb. Philips. + Pr. Arthur, p. 16. Lee's, Sophon. It confifts wholly of metaphors drawn from two most fruitful fources or fprings, the very bathos of the human body, that is to fay *** and ***** hiatus magnus lachrymabilis ****. And felling of bargains, and double entendre, and K.ββέεισμος and Ολδειλδισμος,all derived from the faid fources. 4. The FINICAL STILE, which confifts of the moft curious, affected, mincing metaphors, and partakers of the alamode: as the following: Of a brook dryed by the fun. Won by the fummer's importuning ray Of an easy death. When watchful death shall on his harvest look, Of trees in a ftorm. Oaks whole extended arms the winds defy, Of water fimmering over the fire. The Sparkling flames raife water to a smile, 5. LASTLY, I fhall place the CUMBROUS, which moves heavily under a load of metaphors, and draws after it a long train of words: and the BUSKIN, or flately, frequently, and with great felicity, mixed with the former. For as the firft is the proper engine to depress what is high, fo is the fecond to raife what is bafe and Idem, p 23. + Blackm, Job. p 26. low low to a ridiculous vifibility. When both these can be done at once, then is the bathos in perfection: as when a man is fet with his head downward and his breech upright, his degradation is compleat: one end of him is as high as ever, only that end is the wrong one. Will not every true lover of the profound be delighted to behold the most vulgar and low actions of life exalted in the following manner? Who knocks at the door? For whom thus rudely pleads my loud-tongu'd gate, That he may enter ? See who is there? Alvance the fringed curtains of thy eyes, Shut the door. The wooden guardian of our privacy Bring my cloaths. Bring me what nature, taylor to the bear, Light the fire. Bring forth fome remnant of Promethean theft, Snuff the candle. Yon' luminary amputation needs, Thus fhall you fave its half extinguifb'd life. Uncork the bottle, and chip the bread. CHA P. XIII. A project for the advancement of the bathos. HUS have I, my dear countrymen, with incre THUS dible pains and diligence, difcovered the hidden fources of the bathos, or, as I may fay, broke open the ahyffes of this great deep. And having now eftab ifhed good and wholesome laws, what remains, but that all true moderns, with their utmost might, do proceed to put the fame in execution? in order whereto, I think I fhall, in the second place, highly deferve of my country, by pro. pofing fuch a scheme as may facilitate this great end. As our number is confeffedly far fuperior to that of the enemy, there feems nothing wanting but unanimity among ourselves. It is therefore humbly offered, that all and every individual of the bathos do enter into a firm affociation, and incorporate into one regular body, whereof every member, even the meaneft, will fomeway contribute to the fupport of the whole; in like manner, as the weakest reeds, when joined in one bundle, become infrangible. To which end our art ought to be put upon the fame foot with other arts of this age. The vaft improvement of modern manufactures arifeth from their being divided into feveral branches, and parcelled out to feveral trades: for inftance, in clock-making one artist makes the balance, another the fpring, another the crown-wheels, a fourth the cafe, and the principal workman puts all together: to this economy we owe the perfection of our modern watches, and doubtlefs we allo might that of our modern poetry and rhetoric, were the feveral parts branched out in the like manner. Nothing is more evident, than that divers perfons, no other way remarkable, have each a strong difpofition to the formation of fome particular trope or figure. Ari. VOL. V, ftotle I ftotle faith, that "the hyperbole is an ornament fit "for young men of quality," accordingly we find in thofe gentlemen a wonderful propensity towards it, which is marvellously improved by travelling. Soldiers alfo and feamen are very happy in the fame figure. The periphrafis or circumlocution is the peculiar talent of country farmers; the proverb and apologue of old men at clubs; the elipfis, or fpeech by half-words, of minifters and politicians; the apofiopefis of courtiers; the litotes, or diminution, of ladies, whisperers, and backbiters; and the anadiplofis of common cryers and hawkers, who, by redoubling the fame words, perfuade people to buy their oyfters, green haftings, or new ballads. Epithets may be found in great plenty at Billingsgate, farcafm and irony learned upon the water, and the epiphonema or exclamation frequently from the Bear-garden, and as fre quently from the hear him of the house of commons. Now, each man applying his whole time and genius upon his particular figure, would doubtless attain to per fection; and when each became incorporated and fworn into the fociety, as hath been propofed, a poet or orator would have no more to do but to fend to the par. ticular traders in each kind, to the metaphorift for his allegories, to the fimile maker for his comparisons, to the ironift for his farcafms, to the apothegmatift for his fentences, &c, whereby a dedication or fpeech would be compofed in a moment, the fuperior artift having nothing to do but to put together all the materials. I therefore propofe, that there be contrived, with all convenient difpatch, at the public expence, a rhetorical chefl of drawers, confifting of three ftories, the highest for the deliberative, the middle for the demonftrative, and the lowest for the judicial. They fhall be divided into loci or places, being repofitories for matter and ar• gument in the feveral kinds of oration or writing; and every drawer fhall again be fubdivided into cells, refembling thole of cabinets for rarities. The apartment for peace or war, and that of the liberty of the prefs, may, in a very few days, be filled with feveral arguments perfectly new; and the vituperative partition will as eafily be replenished with a most choice collection, entirely of the growth and manufacture of the prefent age. Every com poler |