TO HIS SISTER.

CHARLESTON, JULY 15, 1803.

MY DEAR SISTER,

WHILE on a short visit at our brother and sister M's, last fall, I wrote you a few lines in great haste, informing you, that my dear wife, with her sister, Miss M. L. and myself, had spent a considerable part of the preceding season in travelling, first by sea to New-York, and then by land to Ballston Springs, and thence through New-England, &c. &c. chiefly with a view to the benefit of Mrs. K's health, which had been for several years greatly impaired. This measure was adopted and pursued, after the skill of physicians, and the power of medicine, had been long tried, without much effect, as the one which seemed to promise most success. But it did not please the Lord, in whose hands are all events, to render it effectual to the attainment of the desired object. For a time, indeed, it seemed to be attended with the happiest effects. All the pleasing, flattering hopes, however, which were thus raised, soon terminated in painful disappointment.

We returned to Charleston by land; after travelling from New-York, in various places and directions, about 2000 miles, from the middle of July. Generally, while riding, my dear Mrs. K. was sensibly better, but within a few days after reaching home, which was on the 2d of December, she was confined to her chamber, in consequence of the increase of a cold which she had taken on the road. At different times, her cough was

attended with a spitting of blood. And from this period, her former complaints, increased by this severe cold, and alarming hæmorrhage, began to assume decidedly the form of a consumption, of the nervous class; under which she languished, till the 15th day of May last ; when, between six and seven o'clock, in the morning of the Lord's day, she left me, and her other connexions and friends here, in the house of mourning, and triumphantly entered upon the enjoyment of that everlasting sabbath, which is celebrated by the spirits of the just, made perfect in glory.

"To her to die, was indeed great gain." But to me, how great is the loss, which I suffer in being again bereaved of the nearest and dearest of all human connexions; and again deprived of all the desirable advantages and comforts, which were found in the society of a worthy and amiable Christian friend, united with me in the tenderest of all mortal ties. But the Lord is righteous in all his ways, and holy in all his works. He doth all things well; and under his administration, and through his sanctifying blessing, all things shall most certainly and effectually work together for good, to those who love him. And blessed be his name for all the rich, and strong consolations, with which he has mingled and sweetened the bitter cup, which he has given me to drink; while he calls me to mourn under this bereaving stroke of his holy hand!

The first months of my dear wife's illness, were to her a season of great trial. Her affectionate heart, feeling the full force of a naturally warm and tender attachment to her beloved connexions and friends, was some. times almost overwhelmed with the thought of a final separation from them, as to this world, which she began

to anticipate as near at hand. Still more was she distressed with a consciousness of many spiritual infirmi ties, and of various guilt; especially when she considered herself as an ungrateful backslider, who had suffered the cares and the enjoyments of this life, to abate the zeal and delight, which she had experienced for sometime after she began to walk in wisdom's ways, under the influence of her first love. And at the same time, the temptations of the artful, malicious adversary, were frequently employed to darken and perplex her mind; and more particularly to increase her natural dread of suffering; and especially her fear of the pain of dying. He was, however, never permitted to prevail so far against her, as to deprive her wholly of the hope in her Redeemer, which she had cherished, and which she was enabled to hold fast, from the period of her first making an open profession of her faith in him, and of her being received into the communion of his church, which was about seven years ago. As to her hope, she repeatedly observed, that she had often, and often examined the foundation of it, and earnestly prayed,. that if it were not a genuine, well-founded, christian hope, it might be torn from her, and she left destitute and forlorn, till she should obtain a better. But finding that it rested solely on the atonement, the righteousness, the intercession, and the promises of her Redeemer, she was led to rejoice in him, as an holy Saviour, who saves his people from their sins, and makes them holy; while it disposed her to renounce, with abhorrence, the idea of recommending herself to the favour of God, by any good works that she had ever done, or ever could do, and proved an anchor to her soul, amid the most violent assaults of temptation, and under the

most humbling discoveries of her own corruptions, failings, and offences. She thought that her hope was supported by scripture evidence, and that to give it up, would be ungrateful to her Lord, and a wrong done to her own soul. Yet, such were her views of the corruptions of her nature, and such her conflicts in the christian warfare, that she enjoyed, for a long time, but little of the peculiar satisfactions or consolations of religion. And while in this uncomfortable frame of mind, she would frequently, and most pathetically repeat, that excellent expressive hymn of Cowper, the 98th, Rippon's Selection; or the 3d in the 1st Book of Olney Hymns.

Oh, for a closer walk with God,
A calm and heavenly frame :
A light to shine upon the road
That leads me to the Lamb!

Where is the blessedness I knew,
When first I saw the Lord ?
Where is the soul refreshing view

Of Jesus and his word?

What peaceful hours I then enjoy'd,
How sweet their memory still;
But now I find an aching void,
The world can never fill.

Return, O holy Dove, return,
Sweet messenger of rest!'

I hate the sins that made thee mourn,

And drove thee from my breast.

The dearest idol I have known,
Whate'er that idol be,

Help me to tear it from thy throne,
And worship only thee..

So shall my walk be close with God,

Calm and serene my frame :

So purer light shall mark the road,

That leads me to the Lamb.

At length the scene became most happily changed in her favour, and to the unspeakable consolation of her sympathizing friends. This change from an anxious and gloomy, to a calm and heavenly, frame of mind, took place more than two months prior to her dissolution. The Spirit of God, having brought her down to a state of deep humiliation and contrition, began then clearly and satisfactorily to bear witness with her spirit, that she was a child of God, through her union, by a vital faith, with his beloved Son, and that he was exercising her with all the afflictions and trials which she endured, not for his pleasure, but for her profit, that she might become a partaker, in a larger measure, of his holiness. Being now enabled, with humble confidence, to claim an interest in his favour and love, while relying with a cheerful, stedfast trust, on the atoning, cleansing blood, and justifying righteousness, of Jesus, her broken, sorrowing heart, was healed and revived; nor were the consolations of God any longer small with her. Her soul now filled, if not with sensible joy, at least with solid, settled peace in believing, no longer felt its former difficulty and reluctance, in giving up all the endearments and comforts, which she had experienced, or could ever hope to find, in the society of her dearest relatives and friends on earth; for now all her hope and confidence, her affections and joys, were concentrated in that Divine Friend, her blessed and dear Redeemer, as she constantly called him, who, she was assured, could alone effectually help and comfort her, and would never leave nor forsake her. And under the influence of a stedfast faith, and lively hope in him, and in the cheering prospect of that eternal life, which God has, in and through him, promised to believers, she was now