Col. Come, my lord, against you are difpofed; here's to all that love and honour you.

Ld. Sparkifh. Ay, that was always Dick Nimble's health. I'm fure you know he's

dead.

Col. Dead! well, my lord, you love to be a meffenger of ill news: I'm heartily forry; but, my lord, we must all die.

Neverout. I knew him very well: but, pray, how came he to die?

Mifs. There's a queftion! you talk like a poticary: why, because he could live no longer.

Neverout. Well; reft his foul: we must live by the living, and not by the dead. Ld. Sparkish. You know, his house was burnt down to the ground.

:

Col. Yes it was in the news. Why fire and water are good servants, but they are very bad masters.

Ld. Smart. Here, take away, and fet down a bottle of Burgundy. Ladies, you'll stay and drink a glafs of wine before you go to your tea.

All taken away, and the wine fet down, etc.

Mifs gives Neverout a smart pinch. Neverout. Lord, mifs, what d'ye mean? d'ye think I have no feeling?

Mifs. I'm forc'd to pinch, for the times are hard.

Neverout [giving Mifs a pinch]. Take that, mifs; what's fauce for a goofe is fauce for a gander.

Mifs [fcreaming]. Well, Mr. Neverout, that thall neither go to heaven nor hell with

you.

Neverout [takes Mifs by the hand]. Come, mifs, let us lay all quarrels afide, and be friends.

Mifs. Don't be fo teizing: you plague a body to! can't you keep your filthy hands to yourfelf?

Neverout. Pray, mifs, where did you get that pick-tooth cafe?

Mifs. I came honestly by it.

Neverout. I'm fure it was mine, for I loft just such a one; nay, I don't tell you a lye.

Mifs. No; if you lye, it is much.

Neverout. Well, I'm fure 'tis mine.

Mifs. What! you think every thing is yours, but a little the king has.

Neverout. Colonel, you have feen my fine pick-tooth cafe; don't you think this is the very fame?

Col. Indeed, miss, it is very like it,
Mifs. Ay; what he fays, you'll fwear.
Neverout. Well, but I'll prove it to be

mine.

Mifs. Ay; do, if

you can.

Nevercut. Why, what's yours is mine, and what's mine is my own.

Mifs. Well, run on till you're weary; nobody holds you.

Never out

Neverout gapes.

Col. What, Mr. Neverout, do you gape for preferment?

Neverout. Faith, I may gape long enough, before it falls into my mouth.

Lady Smart. Mr. Neverout, my lord and I intend to beat up your quarters one of these days: I hear, you live high.

Neverout. Yes, faith, madam; I live high, and lodge in a garret.

Col. But, mifs, I forgot to tell you, that Mr. Neverout got the devilishest fall in the park to-day.

Mifs. I hope he did not hurt the ground: bnt how was it, Mr. Neverout? I wish I had been there to laugh.

Neverout. Why, madam, it was a place where a cuckold had been buried, and one of his horns fticking out, I happened to stumble against it; that was all.

Lady Smart. Ladies, let us leave the gentlemen to themselves; I think it is time to go

to our tea.

Lady Anfw. and Mifs. My lords and gentlemen, your most humble fervant.

Lord Smart. Well, ladies, we'll wait on you an hour hence.

The gentlemen alone.

Ld. Smart. Come, John, bring us a fresh bottle.

Col.

Col. Ay, my lord; and pray, let him carry off the dead men, as we fay in the army. [Meaning the empty bottles. Ld. Sparkish. Mr. Neverout, pray, is not that bottle full?

Neverout. Yes, my lord; full of empti

nefs.

Ld. Smart. And, d'ye hear, John, bring clean glaffes.

Col. I'll keep mine; for, I think, the wine is the best liquor to wash glasses in.

DIA.

The ladies at their tea.

Lady Smart.

1.

WELL, ladies; now let us have a cup of

difcourfe to ourselves.

Lady Anfw. What do think of you Friend, fir John Spendall?

your,

Lady Smart. Why, madam, 'tis happy for him, that his father was born before him. Mifs. They fay, he makes a very ill hufband to my lady.

Lady Anfw. But he must be allow'd to be the fondeft. father in the world.

Luty Smart. Ay, madam, that's true; for they lay, the devil is kind to his own.

Mifs. I am told, my lady manages him to admiration.

Lady Smart. That I believe, for fhe's as cunning as a dead pig, but not half fo honeft.

Lady Anfw. They fay, the's quite a stranger to all his gallantries.

Lady Smart. Not at all; but you know, there's none fo blind as they that won't

fee.

Mifs. O madam, I am told, the watches him as a cat would watch a moufe.

Lady Anfw. Well, if the ben't foully be

lied, the pays him in his own coin.

Lady